I do live in Lewes.
But,
1) I don`t own red trousers or trilby hat
2)My kids aren`t called Felix or Tarquinius
3)I haven`t got a beard
4)I`m def not Veggie
5)I haven`t got a degree at all
6)I`m not from London.
7)I do like Harveys
8) I haven`t got a bike.
9) I`m not an artist,poet or yoga...