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When a lawyer defends a client, they put together dispassionate arguments. They don't have to believe they are right they are just their to make sure their client gets seen in the best possible light. A while back there was a brilliant video of one of the visiting German team's supporters...

This would make an interesting defence for sex offenders. My client is not a paedophile my lord, merely respecting an ancient Roman tradition of having sex with minors.