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Another time I even spoke to a girl - in real life and everything. Crazy, eh?

I woke up under a chalet maid's bed at Butlins in Bognor once. My mate was shagging the maid in the bed and that was what woke me, she was a screamer. I was sick there and then, got up and saw that I was covered in blood (I'd fallen over climbing a fence to get in - it was a disco weekender)...