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Not at all. Too old to care about being cool and far too old to be bothered about someone who thinks they're an internet legend at 10pm on a Thursday on a rival's forum. I do hope you're a teenager. It would be extremely tragic if you're well past 25 and thinking this is funny. Anyhoo, you fill...

Dear oh dear. It really looks like you're getting into this internet persona way too much. Seriously, the party is only happening in your head. You really need to get out more. You're coming across as such a mediocrity that no-one's got the enthusiasm to hang around in this thread for too long...

You're trying way too hard with this internet persona. It's coming across as very Colin Hunt 'Look at me, I'm crazy. Just bonkers, me!'. And this is the internet. Sorry to be the bringer of bad news but someone needs to tell you. It's all a bit crap.