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"Achtung ! Hande Hock! Raus, Raus, for you, Tommie, ze var is Over"

There you go. Proof. Watch his lips as he does the old imaginary ski poles, firstly he says "yes, get in there," followed by a sudden realisation that his anorak is the short one without pockets to put his tiny hands in...then he mouths "gottle of geer" ventriloquist style...and he hasn't bought...

Chrissy is the very devil with his outrageous behaviour. Every cold monotone appraisal of the teams performance and superficial wiseness hold back a wild eyed berserker. The neatly trimmed goatee and smart anorak offer hints to a self taught criminal psychologist like me. And as for the rumour...