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Good. One less rival for me.

An Albion pouffe?

I pad spell check strikes again.

I'd be (bizarrely I know) Victoria Coren-Mitchell's bog seat or Connie Huqs bike saddle. I'd even put up with David Mitchell's and Charlie Brookers porridge. In the case of Huq I'd crawl naked through broken lightbulbs just to stick matchsticks in her shit.