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You've gone too bloody far now Putin you b@stard. You've cost us a glorious victory with your special military operation. Come on Boris, release the nuclear weapons!

If your country is being bombed the **** out of and thousands of your population are being murdered, I wouldn't imagine winning the bloody Eurovision would even enter your thoughts. So don't patronise them and vote (as if) fairly. However there's another part of me that says let's give that...