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That would be handy. I'd know when they were onto me.

Surviving on pea-wet and corned-beef hash. A fate worse than death :-)

This. I do not want to survive an apocalypse. I went to Bolton once, that was quite close enough for me.

I’ve survived this long without the government sending out alerts. I live in West Sussex, I doubt anything too life threatening is going to befall us.

I don't want to know about the nuke strike. I just want to look up, briefly wonder why the sky is white and then have my face melt off without knowing what hit me, thanks. Is there an app for that? QR code or something?

If you have an old phone you are a bad consumer, of no monetary value to big business and it is beneficial to them if you die. I am joking. Sort of.