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Ahh I remember walking into the one in Bluewater whereupon a child in Bermuda shorts, stepped out from a fake bush by the entrance said the following to me, in an American accent; “Hi, what’sup, welcome to the pier”. Obviously I looked at him confused and said “I’m sorry, what did you say?”...

I imagine that if you walked into the design room at Gant, you would find a square cube being used as their clothes model. Honestly, I think the only person that would actually fit a Gant shirt properly is Spongebob Squarepants.

Get yourself a too-tight t-shirt with a weird embossed logo on it. Happily, you will find the back of the embossing has a lovely sticky rubber-type coating. Which adheres to the skin on anything except the coolest of days.