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I agree with you. Access for her to put the bins out etc is fine. It's her right of way, not a public one. Maybe that just needs explaining in simple terms. if she still insists that her friends use it, then i'd lock it until she can prove that they have the right to do so (she won't be able...

that's the problem. If it's a right of way that can be proven to be in use, it can't

Bolt and lock everything. Then the burden of proof will fall to her, at her time and expense. Just say from the outset that once proven either way, you will be happy to comply.