You're not a dick. If I recall correctly from 'early' NSC, you're Barn Tit Seaweed. (But I can't recall who it was who gave you that name. Was it Dave the Eaaaggllleee?)
That the BBC, ITV and SKY can throw all the money and presenting talent they like at Election Night coverage, but if you aren't following it all right through the night on NSC at the same time it's a pretty pointless endeavour.