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Police interviews? I suppose he’d sobered up by the time they spoke to him.

I really disagree with that. Bournemouth have had a tough run (like Burnley did a year ago or so) but they have quality in that squad and I’m sure Eddie would build on their survival and get them nearer 10th next season if they survive. Watford have some terrific talent with the likes of...

Elton?

We should be too. I’d rather Watford stay up but boy would there be some nice titbits in the rotting remains at Vicarage Road for a circling hungry Seagull on the scavenge! Doucouré, Sarr.......yummy. Quick flight to the coast and we could pick up Brooks and Wilson. Delicious!

Villa would escape the drop zone with a win against FA Cup focused Arsenal.

If it goes to 0-4 (0-3 now) Watford would have the same GD as Villa & B’Muff. Not a great place to be in when Arsenal is your next fixture.

Beats a turd-toupee I suppose?

At least they can’t send ‘Nige’ Pearson around to your house to give you a *fat-lip/thick ear/knuckle sandwich. *Delete according to preference!

For me, Bournemouth are a real bogey team. We very rarely do well against them. I’m sure we’ll have better luck against their replacement.

That’s the exact look my 4 year old makes prior to him crying. Got to credit Eddie there for pulling back from the brink and keeping his eyes dry.

Holding back the tears.........

Eddie will cry if this is ruled out!