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Or NASA. He could do with a respite from gravity.

Staying at CP will guarantee a career without proper honours. Other than a brief fail at Manure, what a let down of a career for someone spoken of as so talented.

Doesn’t Parish hold out for £90m or something along those lines? Knowing full well that imprisons (on big pay) his main game-changer.

Isn’t it the same every summer and early autumn - a protracted sulk as a silly price tag is put on his head, no takers and then a huge pay rise? Football writers and pundits on eg the excellent R5 Monday Night Football Club, have often said that his mistake was signing that last very long...

Parish’s Botox consultant confirmed that this is true. The £10m will finance the first ten rows of seats in the largest stand in global sporting history. Any money left will be spent on top pest control experts, to finally try to find the rat infestation at their Beckenham training portakabins.

No, that would be a ridiculous comparison, not fair in the slightest. The PL broadcasting deal was much lower then, so all PL clubs had far lower payroll costs in 2013/14.

No. Typical New Year’s Resolution.

We couldn’t get a place at the historic Hospiz Alm, so at the Italian in the modern Ski Academy by your nearest lift. So missed out on the attractive Lederhosen wearing waitresses :down:

You’re not alone there. I made the fatal mistake of going semi-unfit and after putting on some weight in Nov/Dec. Paying the price skiing with thigh burn (anaerobic, lactic acid) and knees discomfort. I’ll definitely go fitter and lighter next time. Have you got a meal out booked for the...

Digressing completely, harry Wilson’s tackle , how’s the skiing, the hotel, weather and have you skied the pisted link to Zurs?

Le Sulk cost them a possible 2 points.

Funny to see arrogant Everton knocked back. Moshiri’s magic money tree spending £580m in fees in alone recent years (excluding the proposed Zaha fee), despite EFC’s relatively modest income.

Diving practice in full Arsenal kit, on his specially made home ice rink.

That may be, but it’s currently easy for Zaha to get his post match groceries (Kleenex) at Sainsbury’s, Whitehorse Lane. You can bet Goodison hasn’t that perk.

Don’t trust Warnock ... he did business with ‘agent’ Willie McKay.

once their school gates open.

I thought the same. Arsenal or Spuds, and he gets to stay in London. But they’ve both spent record sums already (including a further £90m by Spuds today/tomorrow on Lo Celso and Sessegnon). So it looks like Zaha will be teaming up with world class Michael Keane, Walcott and Delph.

A genuine question for you ... why does Zaha rate Everton a better place for his future than CP? Parish pays him fortunes, he’s loved, the team’s built around him and Everton (also) never win anything. I can’t see what’s the great attraction for Zaha.

Partly explained by their colossal run away wages bill (relative to income), with overpaid fringe players such as Benteke, Wickham and Riedewald unsaleable.

The sales of Wan-k-bissaka and (likely) Zaha, has inflamed opinions against old Parish. A sample post: Everton now trying to dump them with out of favour Tosun and Mccarthy as part of the deal. Whatever happened to the £100m cash valuation?