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In various parallel universes we have lost by a margin of 1-∞....in our universe, we have won by 5 runs, however, there are parallel universes where David Cameron is a caring, benevolent socialist so remember this victory comes at a cost.

Definitely

Crikey, don't they know they are playing Sussex ? This must be a betting scam.

Indeed, looks like the crunchers won't have much problem after that first over.