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"Knowing me Pavilionaire, knowing you Leon Knight. A-ha!"

I won't ask what you're going to do instead because there's plenty of jokers on here who'll come out with lines like "bouncer for Mothercare" "Gary Coleman lookalike" etc. But what will you do if you hang up your boots?

Leon, you've played for 5 Micky Mouse clubs in the last two years, scoring 9 goals in total. If two or three League One clubs are interested why don't you just sign for the least bad option, just to get yourself started? At least you'd be back in the shop window. And if you haven't got a...