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Ok.... Would you let an 97 year old man with crippled fingers finger your bum hole....with all that getting past your grapes entails, whilst slobbering in your ear what he wants to do to your Nan & sticking his tongue down your ear breathing his Meals On wheels stodgy custard smell all over you...

Not for Stacey Slater. She is just sooooooo Chav.

You edited that, don't forget the other half a bar.

Would you spend a week on Death Row being used as a no holds barred sex toy by all the convicts for a lifetime of living in a Californian beach house with all the money you could ever want. You are not allowed to take lubrication with you into death Row though. You would however get Abbi Clancey...

Would you let Archer & Belloti smear your body in deep heat before spit roasting you in front of the girl you have fancied all your life for them NOT to sell the Goldstone?