[Albion] Strange things people do at the Amex

Terry Butcher Tribute Act · Mar 5, 2023

One of my biggest criticisms of the Amex concourse is lack of surfaces to put a drink down, especially if you're eating.

nwgull · Mar 5, 2023

Gabbafella said:
I always see blokes holding a beer while having a piss, it's disgusting, but yesterday was something else entirely. The bloke next to me tried to balance his pint on top of the urinal but it wouldn't stay there, so he stood it IN the urinal while pissing next to it. There's disgusting and then there is whatever this scummy tramp is.
The amount of blokes leaving without washing their hands is also pretty grim.

I often don’t wash my hands in public bogs. I shower nearly every morning and am fairly certain that I’d get more germs on my hands from the taps of some bogs than from my cock, which has been safely and tucked inside my freshly washed pants all day.

Wrong-Direction · Mar 5, 2023

Btw I started the "I'm taking a piss, I'm taking a pisssss" song

Hendrax · Mar 5, 2023

new Japanese fan in front of me streams every game. Can see all the chat box comments scrolling down his screen, in Japanese of course, with a huge camera attachment on the top of his phone.
He has a very steady hand.

SeagullinExile · Mar 5, 2023

Green Cross Code Man said:
My brother came back from the gents at half time yesterday and said a chap had gone in with 2 full pints. The place was heaving and there's pretty much standing room only. It took a moment to dawn on me the conundrum at hand, how on earth did the gentleman manage to have a pee whilst holding onto his beers? If you are that bloke, please enlighten me as it's annoyed the heck out of me since wondering how you may have achieved the impossible.

Green Cross Code Man · Mar 5, 2023

SeagullinExile said:

I had completely forgotten that sketch!

LamieRobertson · Mar 5, 2023

‘‘Look no hands’’?

A mex eyecan · Mar 5, 2023

A1X said:
Taking food or drink into a toilet just seems weird to me, like surely it’s easier and more hygienic to do it the other way round?

what, you mean take food and drink out of a toilet

now that’s truly gross

Mr Banana · Mar 5, 2023

Been going to games basically on my own (because of my exceptional popularity) for the best part of 20 years. Will never know how much sprayback has gone in my beer when I put it on the floor next to me at the urinals. I don't think it does; my (on reflection, irrational) main worry tends to be whether there might be a leak out of the bottom of the urinal. I occasionally go in the cubicle and put it on top of the cistern but the queue for those is usually long and quite awkward anyway, so the lavatorial balancing act is usually required.

Some urinals - think the Amex is one of these - have a bit on their corners at the top which, as an added layer of unpredictable excitement, often looks like there is exactly a 50% chance it might be just big enough to fit most of the cup on without it falling off, although it's difficult to accurately judge when you've had a beer or two. I think this does usually work, in as much as that I can't ever remember my pint falling off it, which would probably require going home immediately if it happened.

On the way out, the corners of the sinks are always big enough to safely hold the pint while you wash your hands. I usually give myself a little pleased nod in the mirror while I'm doing this, to celebrate my uncharacteristically effective multi-tasking.

SeagullinExile · Mar 5, 2023

Green Cross Code Man said:
I had completely forgotten that sketch!

One of the greatest of all time!

The Antikythera Mechanism · Mar 5, 2023

No beer involved but always makes me chuckle

Green Cross Code Man · Mar 5, 2023

Mr Banana said:
Been going to games basically on my own (because of my exceptional popularity) for the best part of 20 years. Will never know how much sprayback has gone in my beer when I put it on the floor next to me at the urinals. I don't think it does; my (on reflection, irrational) main worry tends to be whether there might be a leak out of the bottom of the urinal. I occasionally go in the cubicle and put it on top of the cistern but the queue for those is usually long and quite awkward anyway, so the lavatorial balancing act is usually required.

Some urinals - think the Amex is one of these - have a bit on their corners at the top which, as an added layer of unpredictable excitement, often looks like there is exactly a 50% chance it might be just big enough to fit most of the cup on without it falling off, although it's difficult to accurately judge when you've had a beer or two. I think this does usually work, in as much as that I can't ever remember my pint falling off it, which would probably require going home immediately if it happened.

On the way out, the corners of the sinks are always big enough to safely hold the pint while you wash your hands. I usually give myself a little pleased nod in the mirror while I'm doing this, to celebrate my uncharacteristically effective multi-tasking.

Were you in the West Upper yesterday, trying a new trick?

Mr Phil · Mar 5, 2023

nwgull said:
I often don’t wash my hands in public bogs. I shower nearly every morning and am fairly certain that I’d get more germs on my hands from the taps of some bogs than from my cock, which has been safely and tucked inside my freshly washed pants all day.

Yep someone who doesn't shower daily is exactly the kind of person I'd expect not to wash their hands

Tom Hark Preston Park · Mar 5, 2023

nwgull said:
I often don’t wash my hands in public bogs. I shower nearly every morning and am fairly certain that I’d get more germs on my hands from the taps of some bogs than from my cock, which has been safely and tucked inside my freshly washed pants all day.

Manc by name, mank by nature :thumbsup:

Invicta · Mar 5, 2023

Saw a guy put a pint on floor by urinals whilst pissing, gross given the spray in there !

Another eatiing a burger in one hand whilst pissing With the other.

Motogull · Mar 5, 2023

Not watch the game.

nwgull · Mar 5, 2023

Mr Phil said:
Yep someone who doesn't shower daily is exactly the kind of person I'd expect not to wash their hands

I do shower daily though. Sometimes twice if I go running or to the gym. More germs on a keyboard than on most other surfaces, and how many people snack or eat their lunch at their desks?

Weststander · Mar 5, 2023

Smoking in the NS loos cubicle yesterday, the stench was obvious.

London Irish · Mar 5, 2023

Lol what a thread, feel for the bloke with 2 pints, the concourse queues can get a bit mad at times so obviously you’re not going to do it twice out of choice

portslade seagull · Mar 5, 2023

People not washing their hands after visiting the loo gets my goat

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