Recent content by The aloof gatekeeper

As an example, we finished 19th in the Australian televote, 18th in the Irish, and 17th in the Maltese. Can't be bothered to go through them all, but you get the picture.

We didn't place in the top ten of any countries' televote. If we had have done we'd have got a point.

How about a manager with a 53% win average over 700 games. I give you Dave Challinor.

This is the way. You open the bomb-bay doors, flush, then drop the payload.

Sure we can! You just have to come up with something better to replace them with, is all!

Not quite Premier League ready; they don't have undersoil heating. Which will cause a fuss if games get called off this Winter. I imagine the TV companies will be crossing their fingers if they decide to televise a home tie between January and March.

Many Germans will tell you how sh*t their railway is, if a quick Google search for Deutsche Bahn reputation is anything to go by. It's like most things. It's so awful in the UK (because of the evil Tories) yet have a search for '[insert name of country] [insert topic]' and it's usually the same...

I guess if an unprecedented amount of water vapour is suddenly pumped into the atmosphere it's bound to have an effect: https://www.washingtonpost.com/climate-environment/2022/08/05/volcano-eruption-tonga-record-climate/

When I went for my gender affirmation surgery I said I'd like to be two-spirit. They said sorry, we only offer male and female. Bunch of amateurs.

33 Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez: would happily do.

See, I've always wondered why they don't put the best stuff on last. Top of the bill, as it were. Pretty much every other entertainment show does.

Liverpool, Tottenham, Man City and Chelsea coming up in the next six matches. Let's not start sucking each others' dicks quite yet.

I recently learned that one of the reasons is because a bottle with a top is a trip hazard, where one without will just crush.

"A giant of a man! A gangster, a villain, a murderer, a paedophile, a gerontophiliac, a rapist...and he still had the panache to come at you with a f***ing cigar! AND host children's shows whenever he got the f***ing opportunity! You've got to admire the audacity of that!" Jerry Sadowitz -...