[Football] For what duration of a match could an elite side hide a pub player?

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Questions

Habitual User
Oct 18, 2006
24,963
Worthing
It depends on a lot of things. If anything was at stake, no one would pass you the ball, and if you ever for some weird reason got it it would be lost but there's always a chance of winning it back. Its basically like playing with ten men so the question is more "how long could a team play with ten men without losing?" and there's no real answer to it. In Swansea back in 18/19, Courtney Baker-Richardson was sent off in the fourth minute but Swansea still won 2-1.

Imagine say you were playing someone like Walsall and they went down to 9 men early on and still won 1-0 at your gaff.
 


blue-shifted

Banned
Feb 20, 2004
7,645
a galaxy far far away
Surely depends on fitness levels as unless the pub player is just stood still they’ll have to be running about. I’m late 40s and unfit so would be out of breath after jogging up and down for a minute.

Yeh agree, someone in great shape could away with it for a while. As long as they can play a 5 yard pass and didn't try anything fancy

Probably loads would just be saying, he needs time to adapt etc
 






BNthree

Plastic JCL
Sep 14, 2016
11,047
WeHo
Yeh agree, someone in great shape could away with it for a while. As long as they can play a 5 yard pass and didn't try anything fancy

Probably loads would just be saying, he needs time to adapt etc

Exactly if they were fit enough to run up and down they'd get away with it (it's worked for Jahanbaksh anyway).
 


SockMonster

Well-known member
Oct 12, 2007
802
Brighton
I've always thought that instead of extra time in a cup game, each team should be forced to replace a player with a random member of the crowd, every five minutes until the game is decided. And i mean randomly chosen.......
 


Beanstalk

Well-known member
Apr 5, 2017
2,652
London
I've always thought that you could get away playing in an attacking position like CAM or RW and just do the very basics (pass, move, repeat) and get away with it but you'd be incredibly ineffectual. It's if you got any opportunity to do anything more than pass to feet. There is such a difference in shot power you'd be shocked.
 




Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
73,888
West west west Sussex
I've always thought that you could get away playing in an attacking position like CAM or RW and just do the very basics (pass, move, repeat) and get away with it but you'd be incredibly ineffectual. It's if you got any opportunity to do anything more than pass to feet. There is such a difference in shot power you'd be shocked.

Premier League players can miss-kick a pass further than I can safely transport the ball in my car.
 




Justice

Dangerous Idiot
Jun 21, 2012
19,123
Born In Shoreham
I've always thought that instead of extra time in a cup game, each team should be forced to replace a player with a random member of the crowd, every five minutes until the game is decided. And i mean randomly chosen.......
The St Johns ambiance team would be rather busy.
 




GT49er

Well-known member
Feb 1, 2009
46,993
Gloucester
Good question!

I often dreamed (in my younger days, when I could still run about for 90 minutes, even though I was pretty rubbish at football) of winning the pools and being able to pay the Albion enough to give me five minutes (maximum!) as a sub. at The Goldstone, out on the right wing on a nice day, playing down towards the south stand (I was much better going downhill than running uphill, and I used to get horribly clogged down on muddy pitches).

I reckon, as long as the ball didn't come my way, I could just about got away with it for five minutes ................... just, with luck, and by the skin of my teeth!
 


Herr Tubthumper

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
60,060
The Fatherland
In the case of Shane Duffy, one whole season?
 


A1X

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Sep 1, 2017
18,279
Deepest, darkest Sussex
Depends on the position, if you were put in a left-midfield type position you might get away with it for a while as play can be focussed away (and you'd have an LB to cover the defensive work).
 




Greg Bobkin

Silver Seagull
May 22, 2012
15,038
I few years ago there was a top player who insisted his best friend was also signed as part of the deal .I think they moved to several clubs with the latter not actually playing at all. Someone on NSC will know.

That's bonkers! Why would any team agree to that? (Not saying you're not telling the truth, Rogero, but it just seems crazy that a) a footballer would even suggest/demand that and b) the club would agree to it :shrug:
 


maffew

Well-known member
Dec 10, 2003
8,884
Worcester England
Reminds me of a quora I read regarding an ELO 1200 rated chess player, roughly me going against Magnus Carlson, ie someone who is good compared to most vs the worlds best. The odds were roughly 1 in 20000 of me getting a draw. The orders of magnitude are seismic between competency and the elite, basically like someone from the park trying to out slam dunk Michael Jordan or a county snooker player beat Ronnie over 5 frames. Cant really happen.
 








A1X

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Sep 1, 2017
18,279
Deepest, darkest Sussex
Reminds me of a quora I read regarding an ELO 1200 rated chess player, roughly me going against Magnus Carlson, ie someone who is good compared to most vs the worlds best. The odds were roughly 1 in 20000 of me getting a draw. The orders of magnitude are seismic between competency and the elite, basically like someone from the park trying to out slam dunk Michael Jordan or a county snooker player beat Ronnie over 5 frames. Cant really happen.

Ah, but they might believe they can. Lest we forget 1 in 8 British men think they could take a point off Serena Williams, when in reality almost nobody who is not an elite level tennis player could do so.
 


KeegansHairPiece

New member
Jan 28, 2016
1,829
Honestly, it would be seconds before everyone on the pitch would know, there would be no hiding. People are living in a fantasy world if they think an ordinary Sunday footballer could somehow blend in unnoticed.

Even the step from pub / Sunday football to County games you'd be shown up pretty quickly. Football has incredible depth of ability and quality. Those players in the 6 and 7th tiers are top quality players, most likely the best in your school and that's how far they got.
 


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