Joke Du Jour

ManOnTheRun · 10-02-2006, 16:11

A fellow walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:

Cheese Sandwich 1.50

Chicken Sandwich 2.50

Hand Job 10.00

Checking his wallet he finds one single tenner, he walks up to the Bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men.

"Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile, "Can I help you?"

"I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"

"Yes", she purrs, "indeed I am"

The man replies "Well wash your hands, I want a cheese sandwich."

Trufflehound · 10-02-2006, 16:13

Is it last Wednesday again already?

SJ's Love Monkey · 10-02-2006, 16:15

Quote:

Originally posted by Trufflehound
Is it last Wednesday again already?

I now know i have been here before!!

ManOnTheRun · 10-02-2006, 16:20

Moshe Gariani · 10-02-2006, 16:33

Quote:

Originally posted by ManOnTheRun

no need for embarrassment... provided you've got a valid ticket showing it was your turn to tell "hand job"...

Man of Harveys · 10-02-2006, 16:35

It was pies before - what foodstuff will it be next week?

Lokki 7 · 10-02-2006, 16:37

Quote:

Originally posted by Man of Harveys
It was pies before - what foodstuff will it be next week?

I thought it was funnier with pies, perhaps we could move back to a more pastry dominated food stuff next week?

afters · 10-02-2006, 16:39

well they say that variety is the spice of life....in the 25 yaers or so that i've known that joke it's always been cheese sandwiches so pies gives it a modern edge. a kind of "changing rooms" approach to old jokes if you will.

Lokki 7 · 10-02-2006, 16:41

Quote:

Originally posted by afters
pies gives it a modern edge. a kind of "changing rooms" approach to old jokes if you will.

I didn't realise that a pie gave a room a modern edge. My flat must be very "this year" in that case.

dougdeep · 10-02-2006, 16:42

Who's turn is it to do the Crocodile Sandwich joke?

Man of Harveys · 10-02-2006, 16:43

So: whose turn is it to tell it next Wednesday? Any volunteers? We've all got to tell it once, so you may as well get it out of the way. Maybe suggest a foodstuff and we'll have a ballot.

Moshe Gariani · 10-02-2006, 16:47

i propose

Pork Pie £1.20
Bacon Sandwich £1.80
Hand Job £10

Lokki 7 · 10-02-2006, 16:48

Quote:

Originally posted by Moshe Gariani
i propose

Pork Pie £1.20
Bacon Sandwich £1.80
Hand Job £10

I like. Traditional but with a modern twist.

Trufflehound · 10-02-2006, 16:51

How much for a cheddar ploughmans?

Man of Harveys · 10-02-2006, 16:53

Quote:

Originally posted by Trufflehound
How much for a cheddar ploughmans?

£1.50. But you need TWO foods.

I will be running on a manifesto of:

£1.50 Fish cakes
£2.50 Ham rolls
£10 Handjob

Moshe Gariani · 10-02-2006, 16:55

Quote:

Originally posted by Man of Harveys
£1.50. But you need TWO foods.

I will be running on a manifesto of:

£1.50 Fish cakes
£2.50 Ham rolls
£10 Handjob

i support your choice of ham rolls as i think the joke relies on a hands-on aspect to the requested dish's production...

are they a bit pricey though...?

Man of Harveys · 10-02-2006, 16:56

Quote:

Originally posted by Moshe Gariani
i support your choice of ham rolls as i think the joke relies on a hands-on aspect to the requested dish's production...

are they a bit pricey though...?

It's PARMA ham.

Lokki 7 · 10-02-2006, 16:57

Quote:

Originally posted by Man of Harveys
It's PARMA ham.

Moshe Gariani · 10-02-2006, 16:58

Trufflehound · 10-02-2006, 16:59

Quote:

Originally posted by Man of Harveys
£1.50. But you need TWO foods.

I will be running on a manifesto of:

£1.50 Fish cakes
£2.50 Ham rolls
£10 Handjob

OK, but I like to offer a range of services.

Cheddar ploughmans £1.50
Chicken tikka sandwich £2.25
"Bareback" Handjob £10
Rubber glove Handjob 45p
Silk glove Handjob You couldn't afford it

10-02-2006, 16:11	#1
ManOnTheRun Registered User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: West Hove Posts: 551	Joke Du Jour A fellow walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads: Cheese Sandwich 1.50 Chicken Sandwich 2.50 Hand Job 10.00 Checking his wallet he finds one single tenner, he walks up to the Bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men. "Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile, "Can I help you?" "I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?" "Yes", she purrs, "indeed I am" The man replies "Well wash your hands, I want a cheese sandwich."

10-02-2006, 16:13	#2
Trufflehound It's Poy-YET. Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: You go Uruguay and I'll go mine. Posts: 11,196	Is it last Wednesday again already? __________________ "Around Amsterdam in 80 Beers is probably the best book I've ever written - well, it's in the top two." - Trufflehound Get yours here: http://www.booksaboutbeer.com/beer-b...m-in-80-beers/

10-02-2006, 16:35	#6
Man of Harveys Registered User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Clerkenwell/Brighton Posts: 15,314	It was pies before - what foodstuff will it be next week? __________________ Originally posted by Trufflehound The Englishman says: "Just wash your hands after you've finished jacking off that greyhound please. We're hungry."

10-02-2006, 16:39	#8
afters Registered User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: hove Posts: 6,197	well they say that variety is the spice of life....in the 25 yaers or so that i've known that joke it's always been cheese sandwiches so pies gives it a modern edge. a kind of "changing rooms" approach to old jokes if you will. __________________ he vuelto, o mejor dicho nunca me había ido!!!! Last edited by afters; 10-02-2006 at 16:40.

10-02-2006, 16:42	#10
dougdeep The cute bearded one. Join Date: May 2004 Location: SUNNY SEAFORD Posts: 32,268	Who's turn is it to do the Crocodile Sandwich joke? __________________ Only here for a short time, make the most.

10-02-2006, 16:20	#4
ManOnTheRun Registered User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: West Hove Posts: 551

10-02-2006, 16:43	#11
Man of Harveys Registered User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Clerkenwell/Brighton Posts: 15,314	So: whose turn is it to tell it next Wednesday? Any volunteers? We've all got to tell it once, so you may as well get it out of the way. Maybe suggest a foodstuff and we'll have a ballot. __________________ Originally posted by Trufflehound The Englishman says: "Just wash your hands after you've finished jacking off that greyhound please. We're hungry."

10-02-2006, 16:47	#12
Moshe Gariani Registered User Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 4,038	i propose Pork Pie £1.20 Bacon Sandwich £1.80 Hand Job £10

10-02-2006, 16:51	#14
Trufflehound It's Poy-YET. Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: You go Uruguay and I'll go mine. Posts: 11,196	How much for a cheddar ploughmans? __________________ "Around Amsterdam in 80 Beers is probably the best book I've ever written - well, it's in the top two." - Trufflehound Get yours here: http://www.booksaboutbeer.com/beer-b...m-in-80-beers/

10-02-2006, 16:58	#19
Moshe Gariani Registered User Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 4,038

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