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[Palace] The Always Ultras:: a tale of WOE



Mark Mywords

New member
Jun 21, 2016
34
Takes a while doesn't it. I think I eventually deciphered a laughable attempt at actually depicting a "fortress". That brown lump behind the goal presumably represents a drawbridge. The blue cards are...the sky ? I dunno. Those turrets just look like big cocks. Its almost like a scrawled crayon drawing by a 3 year old. You'd pat them on the head, put it on the fridge door for an evening, then quietly bin it in the morning.

When you lose your first 3 games at home one season (without scoring), and then fail to score at home before Halloween the next season, it kind of undermines the "fortress" aspect you're trying to portray dunnit.

Thanks for that easy! I've been trying to work that out for ages. I thought those white things either side were 2 players wearing white shirt and baggy shorts with brown pockets. Now it is all clear.
 


darkwolf666

Well-known member
Nov 8, 2015
7,575
Sittingbourne, Kent
Thanks for that easy! I've been trying to work that out for ages. I thought those white things either side were 2 players wearing white shirt and baggy shorts with brown pockets. Now it is all clear.

It’s like one of those magic eye pictures, where you have to squint and make your eyes go out of focus to reveal a fantastic 3D picture, except in this instance it doesn’t matter how hard you squint or defocus your eyes, you still see a pile of shit...
 


Postman Pat

Well-known member
Jul 24, 2007
6,971
Coldean
Takes a while doesn't it. I think I eventually deciphered a laughable attempt at actually depicting a "fortress". That brown lump behind the goal presumably represents a drawbridge. The blue cards are...the sky ? I dunno. Those turrets just look like big cocks. Its almost like a scrawled crayon drawing by a 3 year old. You'd pat them on the head, put it on the fridge door for an evening, then quietly bin it in the morning.

When you lose your first 3 games at home one season (without scoring), and then fail to score at home before Halloween the next season, it kind of undermines the "fortress" aspect you're trying to portray dunnit.

More of a buffet than a fortress....rock up, take three points and leave.
 


Easy 10

Brain dead MUG SHEEP
Jul 5, 2003
61,674
Location Location
Thanks for that easy! I've been trying to work that out for ages. I thought those white things either side were 2 players wearing white shirt and baggy shorts with brown pockets. Now it is all clear.

:thumbsup:

When trying to decipher graphical or written communication from Palace fans, I often find it helps to regress, and try to adopt the psychological mindset of a 6 year-old. Or Mark Bright.
 


LlcoolJ

Mama said knock you out.
Oct 14, 2009
12,982
Sheffield
[emoji106]

When trying to decipher graphical or written communication from Palace fans, I often find it helps to regress, and try to adopt the psychological mindset of a 6 year-old. Or Mark Bright.
What does thicko Bright actually do at the club apart from kiss Prince Charming's arse? I can just imagine his input as Parish agonised over the Always Ultra debacle.....
 




papajaff

Well-known member
Aug 7, 2005
3,968
Brighton
Takes a while doesn't it. I think I eventually deciphered a laughable attempt at actually depicting a "fortress"

I honestly couldn't work out what they were. Looks like ladies underwear from the 1700s. Bloomers!
 


dazzer6666

Well-known member
NSC Patreon
Mar 27, 2013
52,027
Burgess Hill
I never did work out exactly what this display was when i first saw it and still not 100% sure now , on first glance i presumed it was a Victoria Plumbing advert for vanity units or perhaps the 2018-19 3rd kit promo , i hope they manage to find a home as i will miss these banksy type cryptic palace displays .



View attachment 101249

Toilet bowl, big lump of shit in the middle (representing Benteke perhaps ?) with the blue rising above it.

I like it.
 


Bozza

You can change this
Helpful Moderator
Jul 4, 2003
55,575
Back in Sussex
Seems those affected by this were promised a letter in the post to explain to them more fully what would be happening. Then, late this afternoon, the club lobbed out an email in a classic "it's Friday afternoon - let's click send and then sod off for the weekend" way that, by all accounts, is so poorly copy and pasted together it's in different fonts. Shambolic.

Dear Mr X,

As you know we have announced a new singing area in the Holmesdale lower tier. In order to facilitate this, we are moving the most vocal group of supporters into the rear of Block E and as such your season ticket, that we know you have held for a long time will not be available to renew for next season.

Whilst we believe this will be a great benefit to the atmosphere and is supported by the vast majority of fans, I completely understand that this is probably very upsetting and disruptive to you, as one of our most loyal and longstanding supporters.

With that in mind we have put together a package of benefits for the 19/20 season that we really do hope will make this transition as painless as possible.

· You will receive a 2-week priority window, (expected to begin on the 22nd of April 2019) to choose any of the seats released after the seat retention deadline. Typically, this would give us enough good seats in all areas of the ground to meet your requirements for the coming season and as long as your new season ticket is purchased before the 31st May 2019 you will receive a 50% discount of the Early Bird price of that season ticket.



· Secondly, we are going to award you 1500 loyalty points so you will be at the front of the queue for away and other desirable tickets.


· Finally, you will be enrolled as a Gold Member free of charge for the 19/20 season. It will give you 48-hour ticket access for additional home tickets, digital matchday programmes for home matches emailed to you 24-hours before kick-off, access to live pre-season friendly games on the official club app and Palace TV, 10% discount in the club shop and online store, and a gift pack. Plus, you’ll get a bonus 200 loyalty points, taking you to 1700 loyalty points as part of this offer.

We do hope that in time you will see that the sacrifice you are making is for the benefit of everyone, this will only enhance the atmosphere and make the club we all love stronger over time.

As the time when season tickets go on sale approaches you will be contacted with the procedure on how to purchase your new season ticket, however in the meantime if you have any questions please email customer.service@cpfc.co.uk or call us on 0208 768 6000

Thank you for your understanding and for your tremendous support, we know this is a big upheaval but on balance we feel it’s something that will prove to be positive for everyone in the long run.
 




dazzer6666

Well-known member
NSC Patreon
Mar 27, 2013
52,027
Burgess Hill
Seems those affected by this were promised a letter in the post to explain to them more fully what would be happening. Then, late this afternoon, the club lobbed out an email in a classic "it's Friday afternoon - let's click send and then sod off for the weekend" way that, by all accounts, is so poorly copy and pasted together it's in different fonts. Shambolic.

Dear Mr X,

As you know we have announced a new singing area in the Holmesdale lower tier. In order to facilitate this, we are moving the most vocal group of supporters into the rear of Block E and as such your season ticket, that we know you have held for a long time will not be available to renew for next season.

Whilst we believe this will be a great benefit to the atmosphere and is supported by the vast majority of fans, I completely understand that this is probably very upsetting and disruptive to you, as one of our most loyal and longstanding supporters.

With that in mind we have put together a package of benefits for the 19/20 season that we really do hope will make this transition as painless as possible.

· You will receive a 2-week priority window, (expected to begin on the 22nd of April 2019) to choose any of the seats released after the seat retention deadline. Typically, this would give us enough good seats in all areas of the ground to meet your requirements for the coming season and as long as your new season ticket is purchased before the 31st May 2019 you will receive a 50% discount of the Early Bird price of that season ticket.



· Secondly, we are going to award you 1500 loyalty points so you will be at the front of the queue for away and other desirable tickets.


· Finally, you will be enrolled as a Gold Member free of charge for the 19/20 season. It will give you 48-hour ticket access for additional home tickets, digital matchday programmes for home matches emailed to you 24-hours before kick-off, access to live pre-season friendly games on the official club app and Palace TV, 10% discount in the club shop and online store, and a gift pack. Plus, you’ll get a bonus 200 loyalty points, taking you to 1700 loyalty points as part of this offer.

We do hope that in time you will see that the sacrifice you are making is for the benefit of everyone, this will only enhance the atmosphere and make the club we all love stronger over time.

As the time when season tickets go on sale approaches you will be contacted with the procedure on how to purchase your new season ticket, however in the meantime if you have any questions please email customer.service@cpfc.co.uk or call us on 0208 768 6000

Thank you for your understanding and for your tremendous support, we know this is a big upheaval but on balance we feel it’s something that will prove to be positive for everyone in the long run.

Discount ‘of’ the early bird price ?

There’s no f ing hope.
 


Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Patreon
Jul 11, 2003
73,384
West west west Sussex
Thank you for your understanding and for your tremendous support, we know this is a big upheaval but on balance we feel it’s something that will prove to be positive for everyone in the long run.

Somewhat presumptive.
 


Bry Nylon

Test your smoke alarm
Helpful Moderator
Jul 21, 2003
19,783
Playing snooker
...the latest from the Palace forums...


Well, I wasn't expecting much from this "explanatory letter" we were promised, and I haven't been disappointed.

Instead of the letter I was told would arrive in the post within a few days, it turns out to be a proforma Email signed "Box Office" - because obviously Parish only deals with the HF nowadays - and it is full of nothing but vague statements which could be taken to mean almost anything.

In fact, I would hazard a guess that it means that us 400 evictees are likely to be shafted even further before this sorry saga plays out.


"...we believe this will be a great benefit to the atmosphere and is supported by the vast majority of fans..."
- oh, and what's the basis for that then? The highly unscientific petition that was set up recently? Certainly no formal research that the club has carried out. Jesus Christ, even the HF are supposedly not in favour of the solution you are proposing!

"You will receive a 2-week priority window, (expected to begin on the 22nd of April) to choose any of the seats released after the seat retention deadline. Typically, this would give us enough good seats in all areas of the ground to meet your requirements for the coming season..."
- Just count the number of qualifiers in that one statement! So we still don't really know when we can apply for our S/Ts - it might be at the end of April, it might not... And then, there should be enough seats to allow us to make a satisfactory choice - if the "typical" pattern of season ticket sales is followed.

Of course - no statement on what happens if/when the typical pattern doesn't apply and there aren't suitable seats - but the obvious implication is "tough sh*t, we've got our shiny new singing section anyway".

"...we are going to award you 1500 loyalty points so you will be at the front of the queue for away and other desirable tickets..."

- apart, of course, from the ones they pre-allocate for the lads in the (soon to be expanded) "singing section", just like they did at the Cup Final...

I'm not even going to talk about the sickly patronising paragraph where they try to make out that the Gold Member package is the ultimate Nirvana for any supporter, and it will really enhance our experience of the club (for one season only, of course).

"...we know this is a big upheaval but on balance we feel it’s something that will prove to be positive for everyone in the long run"
- I fail to see how it's going to be positive for me and the group of friends that we've made over the years at Selhurst when we're being forced to pick out seats in ones and twos all over the ground with vastly inferior views. I don't ever think I'm going to find myself looking over to the Lower Holmesdale at a mass of black clad supporters and say "well, it was all worth it..."

No matter how they dress it up, the club have decided that the present incumbents in E block are inferior supporters, and are not worthy of any serious or sympathetic treatment. They stand in the way of what Parish wants, and as such they must be removed.

A lot of the love I have for Palace has died today.



...this is going well, then. :ffsparr:
 
Last edited:






Driver8

On the road...
NSC Patreon
Jul 31, 2005
15,952
North Wales
Seems those affected by this were promised a letter in the post to explain to them more fully what would be happening. Then, late this afternoon, the club lobbed out an email in a classic "it's Friday afternoon - let's click send and then sod off for the weekend" way that, by all accounts, is so poorly copy and pasted together it's in different fonts. Shambolic.

Dear Mr X,

As you know we have announced a new singing area in the Holmesdale lower tier. In order to facilitate this, we are moving the most vocal group of supporters into the rear of Block E and as such your season ticket, that we know you have held for a long time will not be available to renew for next season.

Whilst we believe this will be a great benefit to the atmosphere and is supported by the vast majority of fans, I completely understand that this is probably very upsetting and disruptive to you, as one of our most loyal and longstanding supporters.

With that in mind we have put together a package of benefits for the 19/20 season that we really do hope will make this transition as painless as possible.

· You will receive a 2-week priority window, (expected to begin on the 22nd of April 2019) to choose any of the seats released after the seat retention deadline. Typically, this would give us enough good seats in all areas of the ground to meet your requirements for the coming season and as long as your new season ticket is purchased before the 31st May 2019 you will receive a 50% discount of the Early Bird price of that season ticket.



· Secondly, we are going to award you 1500 loyalty points so you will be at the front of the queue for away and other desirable tickets.


· Finally, you will be enrolled as a Gold Member free of charge for the 19/20 season. It will give you 48-hour ticket access for additional home tickets, digital matchday programmes for home matches emailed to you 24-hours before kick-off, access to live pre-season friendly games on the official club app and Palace TV, 10% discount in the club shop and online store, and a gift pack. Plus, you’ll get a bonus 200 loyalty points, taking you to 1700 loyalty points as part of this offer.

We do hope that in time you will see that the sacrifice you are making is for the benefit of everyone, this will only enhance the atmosphere and make the club we all love stronger over time.

As the time when season tickets go on sale approaches you will be contacted with the procedure on how to purchase your new season ticket, however in the meantime if you have any questions please email customer.service@cpfc.co.uk or call us on 0208 768 6000

Thank you for your understanding and for your tremendous support, we know this is a big upheaval but on balance we feel it’s something that will prove to be positive for everyone in the long run.

I would be so pissed off if that happened to me I would probably walk away.
 






studio150

Well-known member
Jul 30, 2011
29,555
On the Border
Whilst we believe this will be a great benefit to the atmosphere and is supported by the vast majority of fans,

.

Perhaps in the spirit of full disclosure Parrish would like to publish the evidence that the vast majority of fans support.

Won't happen, but then the club have been very clever by only stating fans rather than CPFC fans, as no doubt by now they are aware that the petition was not fully from CPFC fans only
 


LlcoolJ

Mama said knock you out.
Oct 14, 2009
12,982
Sheffield
Perhaps in the spirit of full disclosure Parrish would like to publish the evidence that the vast majority of fans support.

Won't happen, but then the club have been very clever by only stating fans rather than CPFC fans, as no doubt by now they are aware that the petition was not fully from CPFC fans only
I just had a quick look at the thread about this on the BBS.

The odd mention of the "will of the majority of fans" (sounds familiar, the petition was as bent as the Brexit campaign) but mostly carnage.

A few posters sticking up for the idea, the actual majority shooting them down and feeling disgusted by the actions of their club.

Surprising how many real Palace fans feel exactly the same way as we do about the hoodie wearing, chav wankers who now run their club.

What a total mess.
 


Bry Nylon

Test your smoke alarm
Helpful Moderator
Jul 21, 2003
19,783
Playing snooker
It will be interesting to see what the reaction is at Palace's next home game.

I hope the soon-to-be displaced 400 sing "Steve Parish is a w@nker" for the entire 90-minutes at this game and every other home fixture till the end of the season.
 






The Large One

Who's Next?
Jul 7, 2003
52,343
97.2FM
Perhaps in the spirit of full disclosure Parrish would like to publish the evidence that the vast majority of fans support.

My first thought when I read through the letter they sent out.

If they give one flying shit about their fans, then using primary data - as opposed to third-person hearsay - they should present the evidence that the 'vast majority' (60%...?, 70%...?, more?) of fans have backed this idea. And THEN consult those fans who have already been told (not asked - TOLD) to move.
 





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