Bell Cheeses at work

Badger · Feb 12, 2015

Iggle Piggle said:
Must be worth a game of Family Fortunes for the the 5 top Answers in @spring hall convert s office today. The top answer has obviously already gone but I'll go with :

Whose the new guy? <followed by fake laugh>

Ooh yes, I'll go for:

Does your head feel lighter now?

Meanwhile, the yappy dog is in TOP FORM this morning, by this I mean it squeaks every time its owner leaves the room and YAPS at every stranger who enters the room. It's ok though, it's just being PLAYFUL.

TWOCHOICEStom · Feb 12, 2015

I'm gonna go for. "I almost didn't recognize you! HAHAHAHAHAHAAAA"

spring hall convert · Feb 12, 2015

TWOCHOICEStom said:
I'm gonna go for. "I almost didn't recognize you! HAHAHAHAHAHAAAA"

We have a leader.

hans kraay fan club · Feb 12, 2015

I had just logged on to bounce this thread.

Traffic delays locally meant I had the entire office in peace until 9.25 today.

09.36. Prawn cocktail crisps

09.38. Sleater-Kinney

spring hall convert · Feb 12, 2015

Lots of talk about moisturisers.

spring hall convert · Feb 12, 2015

hans kraay fan club said:
09.38. Sleater-Kinney

If it gave you an excuse to listen to Olympia, Washington's finest, can it really be that bad?

Badger · Feb 12, 2015

American manager woman has been in our office this week, she's just made her GRAND entrance laughing and talking to everyone with her voice turned up to ELEVEN. The guy next to me has correctly pointed out that her laugh sounds like a WITCH by saying "double, double, toil and trouble". She even looks a bit like a witch, scrawny and wears a black cloak-like coat.

Brian Fantana · Feb 12, 2015

Oh LORD.

One of the ladies in the office has been on maternity leave and I genuinely forgot she even existed. Today is her first day back in the office, and the last 52 minutes have been dedicated to showing pictures of her baby to everyone - even people who have joined the company since she went on leave. It's bad enough having to look at things like this on my Facebook feed, but actually having someone invade my desk to show me a picture of what looks like a dribbling potato is going to get very dull very quickly.

If people start asking questions about how the birth was, I'm going to go on a rampage.

Badger · Feb 12, 2015

Brian Fantana said:
Oh LORD.

One of the ladies in the office has been on maternity leave and I genuinely forgot she even existed. Today is her first day back in the office, and the last 52 minutes have been dedicated to showing pictures of her baby to everyone - even people who have joined the company since she went on leave. It's bad enough having to look at things like this on my Facebook feed, but actually having someone invade my desk to show me a picture of what looks like a dribbling potato is going to get very dull very quickly.

If people start asking questions about how the birth was, I'm going to go on a rampage.

It's only a matter of time before she actually BRINGS the baby into work.

Brian Fantana · Feb 12, 2015

Badger said:
It's only a matter of time before she actually BRINGS the baby into work.

I've been trying to block that thought out, but I agree it's INEVITABLE.

hans kraay fan club · Feb 12, 2015

spring hall convert said:
If it gave you an excuse to listen to Olympia, Washington's finest, can it really be that bad?

Whilst my head-phones have undoubtably saved me tens of thousands of pounds in Priory bills over the last few months, my at work catalogue is usually restricted to the likes of Felt / Field Mice / Alvvays, etc. Quiet or cheerful.

Trust me, to need to resort to PUNK POP before a quarter to ten, is bad. Doesn't bode well for the rest of the day. Sisters of Mercy in reserve, in case of real emergencies...

BlockDpete · Feb 12, 2015

Brian Fantana said:
I've been trying to block that thought out, but I agree it's INEVITABLE.

And you will have to hold the dear little shitting monster?

Brian Fantana · Feb 12, 2015

BlockDpete said:
And you will have to hold the dear little shitting monster?

There is not a chance of that happening. Luckily, there are so many broody women in our office, that I'll be well towards the back of any queue for holding the dribble machine.

Napper · Feb 12, 2015

Badger said:
It's only a matter of time before she actually BRINGS the baby into work.

This ridiculous parade has taken place at every single office I've worked in.

Genuinly time to go for a very very very long sh * t when this starts unfolding

Badger · Feb 12, 2015

Napper said:
This ridiculous parade has taken place at every single office I've worked in.

Genuinly time to go for a very very very long sh * t when this starts unfolding

Indeed, a 20 minute DUMP has helped me avoid many an irritating situation. It's also quite useful to break a monotonous day up.

Iggle Piggle · Feb 12, 2015

Badger said:
Indeed, a 20 minute DUMP has helped me avoid many an irritating situation. It's also quite useful to break a monotonous day up.

With the advent of Smart phones, it's great. Saves either discreetly or brazenly sticking todays paper under your arm.

Badger · Feb 12, 2015

Iggle Piggle said:
With the advent of Smart phones, it's great. Saves either discreetly or brazenly sticking todays paper under your arm.

I do quite obviously pick up my phone and head out of the door, I could be taking a DUMP or making a phone CALL, either way the guy next to me knows not to expect me back for a good 15 minutes. I used this at 9am today so I reckon I could realistically get away with another one at 4pm without making it too obvious. My last office was rubbish, I could never get a phone data signal in the toilet so I was restricted by which apps I could use.

Flex Your Head · Feb 12, 2015

Badger said:
Indeed, a 20 minute DUMP has helped me avoid many an irritating situation. It's also quite useful to break a monotonous day up.

Hard to imagine nowadays, but when I worked at my first office job back in the early - mid 80's, I used to disappear twice a day for 10 minutes, at 11.00ish and again at about 3.30. This was so I could sit in a cubicle in the bogs and have a contented smoke.

Thinking about it, I once found a Mars wrapper on the cistern; so very very wrong.

In other, more contemporary news, the request for people to put themselves forward to be on charity committee has had just one taker so far; the fat, bubbly, loud, annoying woman who irritates the living shit out of me. Obviously.

pasty · Feb 12, 2015

Flex Your Head said:
In other, more contemporary news, the request for people to put themselves forward to be on charity committee has had just one taker so far; the fat, bubbly, loud, annoying woman who irritates the living shit out of me. Obviously.

You may be on to something there. The charity committee chairperson (not allowed to call her chairwoman) in our office has exactly the same traits.

Brian Fantana · Feb 12, 2015

Flex Your Head said:
Hard to imagine nowadays, but when I worked at my first office job back in the early - mid 80's, I used to disappear twice a day for 10 minutes, at 11.00ish and again at about 3.30. This was so I could sit in a cubicle in the bogs and have a contented smoke.

Thinking about it, I once found a Mars wrapper on the cistern; so very very wrong.

In other, more contemporary news, the request for people to put themselves forward to be on charity committee has had just one taker so far; the fat, bubbly, loud, annoying woman who irritates the living shit out of me. Obviously.

Why don't you volunteer, and take charge of the committee? The potential for revenge is huge.

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