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[Other Sport] Has wind ever effected your performance



LamieRobertson

Not awoke
Feb 3, 2008
46,485
SHOREHAM BY SEA
:moo:

Some athletes blame poor performances on the state of the pitch. Others blame it on tactics, or perhaps just a bad day at the office.

But blaming your opponent for farting is definitely a new one.

Yet that's exactly what happened at the Grand Slam of Darts in Wolverhampton, with both Gary Anderson and Wesley Harms denying responsibility for the "rotten egg smells".

Two-time Scottish world champion Anderson, 47, won Friday's match 10-2 to progress to the quarter-finals, but Dutchman Harms, 34, was quick to explain his sub-standard performance by accusing Anderson of leaving a "fragrant smell".

He told Dutch TV station RTL7L: "It'll take me two nights to lose this smell from my nose."

World number four Anderson was not best pleased by the accusation, saying the smell had definitely come "from the table side" at the Aldersley Leisure Village.

"If the boy thinks I've farted he's 1010% wrong. I swear on my children's lives that it was not my fault," he said.

"I had a bad stomach once on stage before and admitted it. So I'm not going to lie about farting on stage.

"Every time I walked past there was a waft of rotten eggs so that's why I was thinking it was him.

"It was bad. It was a stink, then he started to play better and I thought he must have needed to get some wind out.

"If somebody has done that they need to see a doctor. Seemingly he says it was me but I would admit it."
 




KZNSeagull

Well-known member
Nov 26, 2007
19,691
Wolsingham, County Durham
The Grand Slam of Farts.

Must have happened before, surely?

One of my best ever rounds of golf was played whilst I had a very dodgy stomach - I didn't dare trying to pass wind due to the potential of unintended consequences. Buttock clenching was obviously the key to shooting 67 gross around Willingdon!
 
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Questions

Habitual User
Oct 18, 2006
24,721
Worthing
I farted once when trying to bowl a quicker ball during a cricket match against Southwick.

It was a particularly violent gruff but luckily took the batman’s off stump clean out.

Never sure what the smiling umpire meant as the new batsman came in and he said “One ball left “
 




Arkwright

Arkwright
Oct 26, 2010
2,786
Caterham, Surrey
I farted once when trying to bowl a quicker ball during a cricket match against Southwick.

It was a particularly violent gruff but luckily took the batman’s off stump clean out.

Never sure what the smiling umpire meant as the new batsman came in and he said “One ball left “

I followed through once, unfortunately I was batting at the time. Luckily it was a windy day and I had a long fitting jumper to cover up my stained whites, well I say whites it was in the days of jock straps.
 


el punal

Well-known member
With the amount of wind swirling around the West Upper concourse on match days I’m surprised none of the players has been affected. Paul Barber has informed me that experts from Porton Down, the M.O.D. Science and Tech. Lab., are coming down to take samples for analysis. :eek:
 


Eeyore

Lord Donkey of Queen's Park
NSC Patreon
Apr 5, 2014
23,377
Now people aren't allowed to smoke in pubs, clubs and elsewhere a GRUFF can do some serious nasal offence.
 




Baldseagull

Well-known member
Jan 26, 2012
10,869
Crawley
Never had a wind assisted victory in sports, but I have cleared an aisle in Tesco, which made getting round with the trolley a bit easier.
 


Questions

Habitual User
Oct 18, 2006
24,721
Worthing
I followed through once, unfortunately I was batting at the time. Luckily it was a windy day and I had a long fitting jumper to cover up my stained whites, well I say whites it was in the days of jock straps.

So you weren’t caught behind ?
 






dingodan

New member
Feb 16, 2011
10,080
5CE0.gif
 


Arkwright

Arkwright
Oct 26, 2010
2,786
Caterham, Surrey
So you weren’t caught behind ?

I was most definitely caught out and caught short. The only good thing was the wicketkeepers refusal to stand up to the spinner.
I once played in a game at Ipplepen, Devon and my fellow opening batsman after a heavy session in Plymouth retired after one ball due to a follow through walking back to the pavilion like a penguin.
 


marlowe

Well-known member
Dec 13, 2015
3,898
I thought this was a thread about fanny farts during coitus which although a rare occurence has been known to disturb my rhythm.
 




portlock seagull

Why? Why us?
Jul 28, 2003
16,979
Some of the gusts on crowded terraces back in the day were disgusting, pure evil, the result of Lager, roadkill burgers and crisps hitting home in the 2nd half. Another reason to keep all seater stadia
 


Iggle Piggle

Well-known member
Sep 3, 2010
5,281
Phil Taylor was apparently renowned for guffing during darts matches. I think it was Alex Roy who called him out on it.
 


GT49er

Well-known member
Feb 1, 2009
46,467
Gloucester
It is, I believe, de rigueur for ballet dancers. Leap, pirouette, land with a thump on one leg with the other raised high to waste level...........and ......whoosh! Which is why experienced ballet watchers will never book seats too near the front.
 


LamieRobertson

Not awoke
Feb 3, 2008
46,485
SHOREHAM BY SEA
It is, I believe, de rigueur for ballet dancers. Leap, pirouette, land with a thump on one leg with the other raised high to waste level...........and ......whoosh! Which is why experienced ballet watchers will never book seats too near the front.

Freudian slip :D
 









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