[NSC] Our most unpopular Football man

The Complete Badger said:

Great call. I completely agree. Keys also comes out of Micky Adams' book in an unfavourable light.

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Easy 10 said:

Strange one, why's that ? Because he refuses to tear up his £70k pw contract Blunderland gave him ? I don't blame him. He might not be very good, but to my knowledge he's never refused to play, he's just been frozen out.

Anyhoo. Top of my footballing hate list is probably Richard Keyes. The talentless, hairy-handed "king of bants" mysogynist, always so desperate to chummily ingratiate himself with the various former footballer pundits in the studio, when it was patently clear most of them wouldn't piss on his teeth if his gums were on fire. Left his cancer-suffering wife of 34 years for one of his daughters friends when she found out he was playing hide the sausage with her. The bloke always made my flesh crawl, he's a weapons grade fvckstick, and I'm delighted he's now holed up in a faraway desert state somewhere or other, broadcasting on some arab channel thats never on my radar. I hope he falls down a well.

Surely THE most punchable FACE in football.

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LlcoolJ said:

Struggling with this.

1. Pardew - A repulsive choad of a human being who has zero redeeming features. Shit at football, shit at football management, cheats on his wife as for some reason the weasel faced gimp thinks he's God's gift (allegedly, oh and with players wives, allegedly), the text messages (oh my God, the text messages!), the FA Cup dance.

The complete lack of any humility despite everyone else seeing what a total, chancing cock he is (West Brom's now unemployed Chairman aside), the fish quiz (seriously, if you've not seen this, or even if you have, then click this link) the fact that he IS A MILLIONAIRE FROM FOOTBALL while being a ****ing moron, is still invited to comment on the game as a pundit despite clearly having less knowledge of it than my cat (who knows to run out of the living room if we're watching a Brighton game cos he doesn't like the noise) and the fact that the fans of every team he's managed hate him, even Palace. And he's Palace.

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Easy 10 said:

Strange one, why's that ? Because he refuses to tear up his £70k pw contract Blunderland gave him ? I don't blame him. He might not be very good, but to my knowledge he's never refused to play, he's just been frozen out.

Anyhoo. Top of my footballing hate list is probably Richard Keyes. The talentless, hairy-handed "king of bants" mysogynist, always so desperate to chummily ingratiate himself with the various former footballer pundits in the studio, when it was patently clear most of them wouldn't piss on his teeth if his gums were on fire. Left his cancer-suffering wife of 34 years for one of his daughters friends when she found out he was playing hide the sausage with her. The bloke always made my flesh crawl, he's a weapons grade fvckstick, and I'm delighted he's now holed up in a faraway desert state somewhere or other, broadcasting on some arab channel thats never on my radar. I hope he falls down a well.

Surely THE most punchable FACE in football.

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Hillian1 said:

Rodwell was frozen out due to his disruptive behaviour, he doesn't actually refuse to play and ticks just enough boxes training wise to get his paycheck. When he is picked to play for the U23s he always gets a slight strain or claims his head isn't right.

That comes from someone I know at the AOL.

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The Complete Badger said:

The plot is essentially that during Micky's time at Coventry, Keys was constantly in the ear of the chairman trying to get him sacked and plotting against him, despite the fact he had no official involvement in the club. At one point he encouraged the chairman to talk to Andy Gray, who could facilitate the appointment of a new man.

That all led to the chairman (who knew nothing about football) calling the wrong Andy Gray. Instead of phoning the Scottish bore and Keys' Sky Sports chum, he spoke to the former Crystal Palace and Tottenham player Andy Gray who had nothing to do with Keys or Coventry and promptly reported back to Adams that he'd just been offered his job.

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The Complete Badger said:

Agreed. I'm not really sure what Zaha's ever done wrong. He's a good player who plays for our rivals. He's scored a few goals against us and said a few things about wanting to beat us, but if the boot was on the other foot we'd be loving that. By all means use him as a pantomime villain, but anyone who actually hates him is a bit too sensitive.

Pardew, on the other hand, offers dozens of reasons for hatred. Forget football, try and name a more slimy, smarmy, dishonourable and egotistical character in the entire world!

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The Complete Badger said:

Adams ends that section of the book by saying that he called Keys after he had been sacked by Coventry and told him that if he ever set eyes on him again he would dish out a beating. So far they have not crossed paths, but Adams says that he will still do that if they do meet again. Bearing in mind Adams left Coventry 11 years ago, the level of anger he still feels really does suggest Keys is an A-grade tit.

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The Complete Badger said:

Agreed. I'm not really sure what Zaha's ever done wrong. He's a good player who plays for our rivals. He's scored a few goals against us and said a few things about wanting to beat us, but if the boot was on the other foot we'd be loving that. By all means use him as a pantomime villain, but anyone who actually hates him is a bit too sensitive.

Pardew, on the other hand, offers dozens of reasons for hatred. Forget football, try and name a more slimy, smarmy, dishonourable and egotistical character in the entire world!

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Pavilionaire said:

That "fish quiz" story is gold, as is "The King" dinner switch story below it, and that's what makes Pardew the man we love to hate.

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Some interesting reading there and confirms for me what I've always knew. That he's a ***** **** of ****ish proportions. How I'd love that AIDS story to be him, and the FA get wind of it and throw the ****ing book at him, banning him from even listening to football on the radio. And someone punches his cock or better still dip it in liquid nitrogen and knock it off with a spanner. Or molegrips. And then shatter it. And then a badger bums him.

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portlock seagull said:

Weren’t there newspaper stories about Taxi, Anton, Mum Shoplifting, Dad Drug dealing, Cobham scandal...to name a few! Other than that, lovely family and fella I’m sure

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