[Misc] The most painful thing in the world

Ceej · Mar 3, 2018

Baldseagull said:
Viz magazine did some research into this, as you commonly hear people say when told of someone elses ailment, "oooh theres nothing worse".
The conclusion was that a paper cut on your bellend was the worst.

With this in mind, I can recommend never rushing and always making sure your John Thomas is securely put away in y-fronts when whizzing up your trouser fly. In my experience this is even more important to remember if you are circumcised. :rock:

Stat Brother · Mar 3, 2018

Herr Tubthumper said:
Is surely the corn I now have on my right inner pinky toe. Or is there something worse?

That's so sweet, we have matching corns.

Berty23 · Mar 3, 2018

I got a football in the nuts playing football after school when I was 15. That night I went to hockey training and got a ball in the face which chipped a tooth which hurt. That evening I was doing my teeth and suddenly collapsed in a heap. I was screaming and it was the worst pain I ever experienced. The village doctor popped over in his pjs and took one look and I was rushed to hospital. Within about an hour I was in the operating theatre being mended.

Ladies and gentlemen I see your tooth pain and raise you a torsioned testicle. I would not wish this on my worst enemy.

It gets worse...I went back to school the following week and my next door neighbour had decided it would be a Laugh to tell everyone I had a wooden bollock. I was called "woody" for a few weeks.

el punal · Mar 3, 2018

Megazone said:
Having a mobile phone charger removed from the anus absolutely kills. There can't be much worse pain than that?

Now that really is the wrong ring tone! :drink:

Is it PotG? · Mar 3, 2018

Gout/renal colic.

Westdene Seagull · Mar 3, 2018

It doesn't matter what type of pain I'm ever in I'm relaiably informed by Mrs W I'm a wuss because child birth is so painful that men wouldn't cope with it. I don't argue because the second most painful thing is Mrs W's sharp tongue.

Spicy · Mar 3, 2018

OzMike said:
Realising that the last 26 years may have been a complete waste of time.

I am sure that is not true. You are a Brighton fan so that's a start and I am sure you have loads to be proud of every day if you think about it. It's often the small things in life which count the most, so don't beat yourself up. :thumbsup:

Miximate · Mar 3, 2018

Gin poisoning. Total agony

sussex_guy2k2 · Mar 3, 2018

Westdene Seagull said:
It doesn't matter what type of pain I'm ever in I'm relaiably informed by Mrs W I'm a wuss because child birth is so painful that men wouldn't cope with it. I don't argue because the second most painful thing is Mrs W's sharp tongue.

Strictly speaking she’s right. Women are biologically made to cope with more pain than us.

HOWEVER, womens’ bodies also release a hormone/chemical into the body throughout childbirth that basically makes them forget the pain. So any woman that tells you that is just lying to you to manipulate you - don’t put up with it anymore lad!

Yes Chef · Mar 3, 2018

I done a hammy on a muddy field in Herstmonceux, that was take your breath away pain.
Sliced a good portion of my thumb off using a mandoline at work once. Hopefully no one found it in their dauphinoise that evening.

DarrenFreemansPerm · Mar 3, 2018

Conceding a 90th minute goal.

El Presidente · Mar 3, 2018

Being stuck in a lift with HB&B

Tricky Dicky · Mar 3, 2018

Psychobilly freakout said:
Every single gentleman reading that, instantly and reassuringly covers the Crown Jewels through gritted teeth and screams oooohh nooooo

Ha Martin. I read your comment first, thought "arh, I wouldn't do that", then read the quote and immediately found my hand covering my, er, lap area !

I think I can honestly say the worst pain I've had was bowel cancer - that was indescribable. I was once in a meeting when I worked in the city - in a meeting room that had glass walls. I had to excuse myself and they watched me collapse outside the door, doubled up on the floor in pain. Calling it bad would be an understatement, on other occasions I was twice rushed to A&E to be given morphine. Not a period of my life I recall fondly.

Official Old Man · Mar 3, 2018

Gout.

BNthree · Mar 3, 2018

The most painful thing in the world is watching the Palace fans on here defend their club and fans no matter what they've done wrong

BNthree · Mar 3, 2018

Odd thing about pain is if something is really painful your brain blocks it out so it is t overwhelmed with the pain signals from the nerves. I dislocated my ankle and broke it in 3 places and. That was painful initially then after a while it was bearable as my brain seemed to sideline the pain so it could carry on as normal.

spongy · Mar 3, 2018

Gout. I'm a grown man and it has had made me cry for hours. I tend to get it in my ankle. For those fellow sufferers out there who get it in their toe. Imagine that pain in a joint 10x as big.

The fear of another attack is always on my mind. Even if I feel a a slight twinge in my ankle im running for the cherry juice, apple cider vinegar, anti inflammatories. The lot. Just to never ever ever experience it again.

mothy · Mar 3, 2018

Having a shower & dropping the slippery soap & picking it up again (when i was in an american prison)

Gabbafella · Mar 3, 2018

Having to listen to any Sam Smith songs, closely followed by gonorrhea. Crying and passing out when you pee is no fun at all.

cheshunt seagull · Mar 3, 2018

At the boundaries of good taste on a chat board but a problem that is quite common but rarely shared. A few years ago I tore my butt sphincter straining far too hard. For about 6 weeks every repeat performance was excruciating and often followed by an hour of agonising spasms....it's not a part of the body that you can really rest . Never known anything like it and take my diet far more seriously now.

Apart from that a tooth abscess or ear infection is pretty all consuming

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