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[Albion] Could this be the answer to our stadium problems?



Buzzer

Languidly Clinical
Oct 1, 2006
26,121
There's a few on-going problems at the Amex

  1. Early Leavers
  2. Long waiting list for season tickets
  3. Club need to raise more revenue from fans
  4. Club like to announce dubiously high attendances

I think I might have a solution that solves all these problems. The club charges fans by the minute for their seat which would allow all those early leavers in the East Stand the opportunity to save a bit of dosh by only buying it for, say, 75 minutes (plus a handling fee). The remaining 15 minutes can be bought by those on a waiting list (plus a handling fee) who are stood waiting at the bars at the ground getting aled up (and bringing the club much needed revenue). If there's an exciting game and the fans decide to stay then we operate a system similar to parking fines. If the game is dull and the early leavers want to leave extra early then they still get charged for what they booked but the fans/customers who would replace them get charged for the full time they are sat.

The added benefit is that this also caters for the half-half scarf brigade because we are likely to get tonked by one of the big sides, leaving the real but fickle fans leaving early in a right strop and then vacating a seat for the fake and fickle fans who are only there to try to get the shirt of a Chelsea/Liverpool/Man U fan at the end of a match.

Just imagine how packed the East Stand will look with the mayhem of people leaving, arriving, arguing over whose seat is whose. And it will mean that for the first time ever there will be a noise from the East Stand.

Attendances per seat can now be double-counted and gives us the opportunity of having more fans see a game without increasing the number of seats.

Don't bother trying to think of any downsides to this because there aren't. It's completely flawless and if Paul Barber is reading this, I'll happily take either a lump sum amount as consultancy or a weekly commission as a share of the profits on this wheeze - or a mixture of both.
 


Mellotron

I've asked for soup
Jul 2, 2008
31,730
Brighton
Superb idea - simple, straightforward and everyone wins. 8 thumbs up from me.
 






There's a few on-going problems at the Amex

  1. Early Leavers
  2. Long waiting list for season tickets
  3. Club need to raise more revenue from fans
  4. Club like to announce dubiously high attendances

I think I might have a solution that solves all these problems. The club charges fans by the minute for their seat which would allow all those early leavers in the East Stand the opportunity to save a bit of dosh by only buying it for, say, 75 minutes (plus a handling fee). The remaining 15 minutes can be bought by those on a waiting list (plus a handling fee) who are stood waiting at the bars at the ground getting aled up (and bringing the club much needed revenue). If there's an exciting game and the fans decide to stay then we operate a system similar to parking fines. If the game is dull and the early leavers want to leave extra early then they still get charged for what they booked but the fans/customers who would replace them get charged for the full time they are sat.

The added benefit is that this also caters for the half-half scarf brigade because we are likely to get tonked by one of the big sides, leaving the real but fickle fans leaving early in a right strop and then vacating a seat for the fake and fickle fans who are only there to try to get the shirt of a Chelsea/Liverpool/Man U fan at the end of a match.

Just imagine how packed the East Stand will look with the mayhem of people leaving, arriving, arguing over whose seat is whose. And it will mean that for the first time ever there will be a noise from the East Stand.

Attendances per seat can now be double-counted and gives us the opportunity of having more fans see a game without increasing the number of seats.

Don't bother trying to think of any downsides to this because there aren't. It's completely flawless and if Paul Barber is reading this, I'll happily take either a lump sum amount as consultancy or a weekly commission as a share of the profits on this wheeze - or a mixture of both.
I think you are onto something here, could sell concourse only tickets so you have all the fun of going to football without the boring bit! Even a park and ride st for those that like sitting on the buses checking the gunners stats! Soccer! Or even a top 6 St just for the big games could include pics with opposition players as part of the package. What about a season ticket for when temperatures are below a certain point(stops any embarrassing plastic melting problems) Great that some are looking at positive measures and not just moaning.:thumbsup:
 




Wrong-Direction

Well-known member
Mar 10, 2013
13,395
Your idea is flawed, it will create no noise from the east, just silent shuffling .

Sent from my SM-A310F using Tapatalk
 


Rogero

Well-known member
Aug 4, 2010
5,711
Shoreham
There's a few on-going problems at the Amex

  1. Early Leavers
  2. Long waiting list for season tickets
  3. Club need to raise more revenue from fans
  4. Club like to announce dubiously high attendances

I think I might have a solution that solves all these problems. The club charges fans by the minute for their seat which would allow all those early leavers in the East Stand the opportunity to save a bit of dosh by only buying it for, say, 75 minutes (plus a handling fee). The remaining 15 minutes can be bought by those on a waiting list (plus a handling fee) who are stood waiting at the bars at the ground getting aled up (and bringing the club much needed revenue). If there's an exciting game and the fans decide to stay then we operate a system similar to parking fines. If the game is dull and the early leavers want to leave extra early then they still get charged for what they booked but the fans/customers who would replace them get charged for the full time they are sat.

The added benefit is that this also caters for the half-half scarf brigade because we are likely to get tonked by one of the big sides, leaving the real but fickle fans leaving early in a right strop and then vacating a seat for the fake and fickle fans who are only there to try to get the shirt of a Chelsea/Liverpool/Man U fan at the end of a match.

Just imagine how packed the East Stand will look with the mayhem of people leaving, arriving, arguing over whose seat is whose. And it will mean that for the first time ever there will be a noise from the East Stand.

Attendances per seat can now be double-counted and gives us the opportunity of having more fans see a game without increasing the number of seats.

Don't bother trying to think of any downsides to this because there aren't. It's completely flawless and if Paul Barber is reading this, I'll happily take either a lump sum amount as consultancy or a weekly commission as a share of the profits on this wheeze - or a mixture of both.

You must be very bored today.
 


Papa Lazarou

Living in a De Zerbi wonderland
Jul 7, 2003
18,840
Worthing
[MENTION=5200]Buzzer[/MENTION] has too much time on his hands today.
 




maffew

Well-known member
Dec 10, 2003
8,861
Worcester England
There's a few on-going problems at the Amex

  1. Early Leavers
  2. Long waiting list for season tickets
  3. Club need to raise more revenue from fans
  4. Club like to announce dubiously high attendances

I think I might have a solution that solves all these problems. The club charges fans by the minute for their seat which would allow all those early leavers in the East Stand the opportunity to save a bit of dosh by only buying it for, say, 75 minutes (plus a handling fee). The remaining 15 minutes can be bought by those on a waiting list (plus a handling fee) who are stood waiting at the bars at the ground getting aled up (and bringing the club much needed revenue). If there's an exciting game and the fans decide to stay then we operate a system similar to parking fines. If the game is dull and the early leavers want to leave extra early then they still get charged for what they booked but the fans/customers who would replace them get charged for the full time they are sat.

The added benefit is that this also caters for the half-half scarf brigade because we are likely to get tonked by one of the big sides, leaving the real but fickle fans leaving early in a right strop and then vacating a seat for the fake and fickle fans who are only there to try to get the shirt of a Chelsea/Liverpool/Man U fan at the end of a match.

Just imagine how packed the East Stand will look with the mayhem of people leaving, arriving, arguing over whose seat is whose. And it will mean that for the first time ever there will be a noise from the East Stand.

Attendances per seat can now be double-counted and gives us the opportunity of having more fans see a game without increasing the number of seats.

Don't bother trying to think of any downsides to this because there aren't. It's completely flawless and if Paul Barber is reading this, I'll happily take either a lump sum amount as consultancy or a weekly commission as a share of the profits on this wheeze - or a mixture of both.

Great idea, 1 in 1 out like a nightclub
 


beorhthelm

A. Virgo, Football Genius
Jul 21, 2003
35,265
innovative. could the seat allocation be carried out using a blockchain technology?
 


maffew

Well-known member
Dec 10, 2003
8,861
Worcester England
Or half and half season tickets so you get to watch either the first or second half, it would do wonders for pie and pint revenues and the half you dony have a ticket for you can watch from the councourse
 




AmexRuislip

Trainee Spy 🕵️‍♂️
Feb 2, 2014
33,727
Ruislip
Superb idea - simple, straightforward and everyone wins. 8 thumbs up from me.

Just a question, what part of the country are you from? :wink:

There's a few on-going problems at the Amex

  1. Early Leavers
  2. Long waiting list for season tickets
  3. Club need to raise more revenue from fans
  4. Club like to announce dubiously high attendances

I think I might have a solution that solves all these problems. The club charges fans by the minute for their seat which would allow all those early leavers in the East Stand the opportunity to save a bit of dosh by only buying it for, say, 75 minutes (plus a handling fee). The remaining 15 minutes can be bought by those on a waiting list (plus a handling fee) who are stood waiting at the bars at the ground getting aled up (and bringing the club much needed revenue). If there's an exciting game and the fans decide to stay then we operate a system similar to parking fines. If the game is dull and the early leavers want to leave extra early then they still get charged for what they booked but the fans/customers who would replace them get charged for the full time they are sat.

The added benefit is that this also caters for the half-half scarf brigade because we are likely to get tonked by one of the big sides, leaving the real but fickle fans leaving early in a right strop and then vacating a seat for the fake and fickle fans who are only there to try to get the shirt of a Chelsea/Liverpool/Man U fan at the end of a match.

Just imagine how packed the East Stand will look with the mayhem of people leaving, arriving, arguing over whose seat is whose. And it will mean that for the first time ever there will be a noise from the East Stand.

Attendances per seat can now be double-counted and gives us the opportunity of having more fans see a game without increasing the number of seats.

Don't bother trying to think of any downsides to this because there aren't. It's completely flawless and if Paul Barber is reading this, I'll happily take either a lump sum amount as consultancy or a weekly commission as a share of the profits on this wheeze - or a mixture of both.

So there's no 3 second rule then :cool:

Great idea BTW :thumbsup:
 




Simontheseagull

Eye from the sky
Jul 11, 2010
496
The Amex
We could also have a bigger fan zone outside the stadium and move the bandstand into Bennets Field Car Park.

As is the case during World Cups, we could have pre match entertainment on the band stand, a giant screen for the 8,000 people on the waiting list to watch the match, with the fan zone surrounded by bars, catering units and toilets.
 




maltaseagull

Well-known member
Feb 25, 2009
12,940
Zabbar- Malta
There's a few on-going problems at the Amex

  1. Early Leavers
  2. Long waiting list for season tickets
  3. Club need to raise more revenue from fans
  4. Club like to announce dubiously high attendances

I think I might have a solution that solves all these problems. The club charges fans by the minute for their seat which would allow all those early leavers in the East Stand the opportunity to save a bit of dosh by only buying it for, say, 75 minutes (plus a handling fee). The remaining 15 minutes can be bought by those on a waiting list (plus a handling fee) who are stood waiting at the bars at the ground getting aled up (and bringing the club much needed revenue). If there's an exciting game and the fans decide to stay then we operate a system similar to parking fines. If the game is dull and the early leavers want to leave extra early then they still get charged for what they booked but the fans/customers who would replace them get charged for the full time they are sat.

The added benefit is that this also caters for the half-half scarf brigade because we are likely to get tonked by one of the big sides, leaving the real but fickle fans leaving early in a right strop and then vacating a seat for the fake and fickle fans who are only there to try to get the shirt of a Chelsea/Liverpool/Man U fan at the end of a match.

Just imagine how packed the East Stand will look with the mayhem of people leaving, arriving, arguing over whose seat is whose. And it will mean that for the first time ever there will be a noise from the East Stand.

Attendances per seat can now be double-counted and gives us the opportunity of having more fans see a game without increasing the number of seats.

Don't bother trying to think of any downsides to this because there aren't. It's completely flawless and if Paul Barber is reading this, I'll happily take either a lump sum amount as consultancy or a weekly commission as a share of the profits on this wheeze - or a mixture of both.

Too much juice methinks! Especially at this time of day.
 










BNthree

Plastic JCL
Sep 14, 2016
10,779
WeHo
Not just the East stand, plenty of early leavers in all stands once the clock has struck 80 minutes gone. Even more money to be made with this glorious scheme.
 


DavidRyder

Well-known member
Jul 23, 2013
2,884
And for those that want to take advantage of mid half toilet breaks, there could be a queue of people (or 'floaters' - which is apt for this particular initiative), who keep the seat warm whilst nature takes it's course.
 



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