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Whores.



herecomesaregular

We're in the pipe, 5 by 5
Oct 27, 2008
4,175
Still in Brighton
A few close shaves when backpacking:

- I was on my own in Malaysia early October 2001 (in a small town near Batu caves, feeling like the only Westerner around after 9/11 and the anthrax scare) when over lunch in a cafe where no-one spoke English, I got chatting to an elderly Malaysian gentleman who said he'd fought in the British Army. A pleasant conversation ensued, interrupted only by a few barked orders from him to the locals. After about 20 minutes a sad looking young boy arrived at the table. The old fecker smiled and nodded, I was confused for a few seconds before realising he was in fact offering this lad up to me. Strange situation to find oneself in. I was bloody angry and insulted but had to get myself out of there pronto without offending anyone as I suddenly felt quite alone. Sad that this seemingly nice old boy, who probably hadn't served at all in the British army, assumed that was the reason I was there.

- Later same trip, my female friend (on her way to Turkey, to get up the duff by a waffle seller as it turned out, unbeknown to her family) met me in Malaysia. To save on costs I had only taken a rather old copy of Lonely Planet and we checked into a cheap hostel. Except we had trouble checking in as they didn't speak English and it turned out since the publishing of this tatty LP it had turned into a whorehouse. They got rather angry and we got rather confused so left and only after speaking to the owner of another place did the penny drop. Later in the trip, this friend and I had a massive, proper East Ender-y, shouty row in the streets of Singapore (ending with me walking away and "How dare you leave me here unprotected in Singapore!" #probablythesafestcityintheworld) and we went our separate ways. To this day, I regret not selling her to that whore house.

- Finally, at the full moon party on Ko Pangnan (?) in Thailand '99 my mate was very close to having relations with a Thai ladyboy in the trees by the beach. Thankfully, while we were pissing ourselves watching, she realised that she could avoid the sexy-stuff and just take his wallet from his pocket, empty it and hand it back to him, while he stood swaying. 25 years later he swore it never happened, funny how you can convince yourself and genuinely change your own memories.

I miss backpacking and having all the time in the world to explore.
 




portslade seagull

Well-known member
Jul 19, 2003
17,588
portslade
Funnily enough I got offered sex near Brighton station middle of the afternoon last week,I don't think that has ever happened to me in Brighton,other cities in Europe it is obviously very common but I was quite shocked.

Awaits a reposte from Enrest
 




marlowe

Well-known member
Dec 13, 2015
3,903
Does anyone remember the one who always used to ply her trade near the top of Brunswick Square on Western Road in the early to mid eighties. I used to see her all the time, usually in the middle of the day. She had long dark straight hair, biggish thighs and often wore thigh length boots with a short skirt. She was acceptable looking, not a stunner but not a total dog either and not at all skanky. She was very unobtrusive and just stood there waiting but never approached or solicited anyone, but didn't need to because it was obvious what she was. It was also illegal to solicit on the streets which is probably another reason she didn't approach anyone. She was always quiet, composed and well behaved and never behaved in a disorderly manner. For some reason I think her name was Ruth, but I'm not positive about that but it's a name I associate her with for some reason but can't remember why. She was a regular fixture there for at least five years and a real anomoly because she was the only whore I was aware of that tried to attract punters on the streets of Hove and Brighton as we don't actually have a designated red light area. Does anyone else remember her? I sometimes wonder what happened to her. She'd probably be pushing 60 now.
 




The Birdman

New member
Nov 30, 2008
6,313
Haywards Heath
Went on a week long trip to watch England vrs Denmark by coach First Night Hamburg next Three nights Copenhagen last night Amsterdam didint se a thing :blush::facepalm:
 


Buzzer

Languidly Clinical
Oct 1, 2006
26,121
A friend of mine who no longer posts on NSC was once accosted by an East European pimp as he was trying to find a taxi take him from the West End where he'd spent the evening to his place in East London. The exchange went something like this:

Pimp: "Hey, my friend. You looking for a good time? You looking for party treats?"
Friend: "No thanks. I'm on my way home.
Pimp: "I can get you the best coke. Very best"
Friend: "No thanks"
Pimp: "You want pills? Crack? Heroin? I get it for you my friend"
Friend: "No. I just want to go home"
Pimp: "What about a girl to warm you up then. I got the best. Black, white. You want 2 girls, I get you 2 girls"
Friend: "Really I'm not interested thanks"
Pimp: "Ah...you like boys? I get you boys"
Friend: No. Thanks but no thanks"

The pimp then played his ace card:

"You wanna piss on a midget?"

Now...my friend had no intention or desire to pee on a midget but he asked the question that many of us would ask in that situation.


Apparently the going rate is 80 quid.
 


Dick Head

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Jan 3, 2010
13,612
Quaxxann
I came out of a club in Spain in the early hours and was approached by a girl offering me "really good sex" whilst trying to usher me down a dark alley. A dark alley with a group of blokes stood down the other end. I declined her offer of "really good sex" and headed to my hotel with all my belongings

Don't knock really good sex down a dark alley with a group of blokes until you've tried it.
 




FatSuperman

Well-known member
Feb 25, 2016
2,829
"You wanna piss on a midget?".

I have a friend from Hove who had something very similar happen in Prague. Except the final offer was for regular midget sex, rather than pissing. My friend stopped at that point and said he was only interested if he could have a threesome with two midgets. The pump paused for a while, had a think and then said he could do that.

Why did he have to stop to think? You've either got two midgets on the books or you don't!
 




Buzzer

Languidly Clinical
Oct 1, 2006
26,121
I'm afraid I'm a bit naive in the ways of the world and always have been. When I had my first bedsit in Worthing it was a shared house on the corner of Tarring Road and Shakespeare Road. I knew by sight the two single mums who lived in the flats upstairs as they were in my brother's year at school. It was the early 90s, I was broke and so my mate and I spent most nights in playing Nintendo but we'd have to answer the front door 5 or 6 times a night for blokes who'd come to visit these girls.

It only occurred to us when after a few weeks my mate went upstairs to where the toilet was and by chance the door to one of the rooms was open and there were 2 blokes obviously strangers, sitting on a settee looking as awkward and out of place as a Palace fan at a black tie function. Mate came downstairs:

"Lee?"
"Yeah"
"You know birds upstairs and they're visitors?"
"Yeah"
"You noticed that they are always blokes?"
"So"
"And they only ever stay for about 40 minutes?"
"And...so what?"
"And they play music upstairs whenever they have guests. And then we hear the shower go on whenever they leave"
"Ah..."

The penny dropped. I was living below a brothel. I moved out the next week.
 






Buzzer

Languidly Clinical
Oct 1, 2006
26,121
I have a friend from Hove who had something very similar happen in Prague. Except the final offer was for regular midget sex, rather than pissing. My friend stopped at that point and said he was only interested if he could have a threesome with two midgets. The pump paused for a while, had a think and then said he could do that.

Why did he have to stop to think? You've either got two midgets on the books or you don't!

Haha! Love stories like that.
 


jackanada

Well-known member
Jul 19, 2011
3,151
Brighton
Before Shoreditch gentrification got properly underway a friend of mine who left the bar 20 minutes behind me turned up a good 40 minutes later and on questioning said he had been waylaid by a prostitute.
After some mirth on my part I was disappointed to find (and he has fessed up to enough embarrassing sexcapades for me to believe him) that while he was offered sex, declined, offered the cheaper blowie and also declined, she then declared the night was dead and as he was a gentleman could he walk her home. Chivalrously he did so and even turned down the offer of a quick handie gratis for his assistance.
Having sobered up slightly as he recounted this take he patted his pockets and began to realise his wallet was missing.
After some swearing and stomping around and generally unkind words about ladies of negotiable affection he pulled himself together and called the police.
They asked for a description. He wrinkled his brow. He paused.
"I think" he said "she might have been... black?"
Seriously best he could manage. So mainly a story about being a useless drunk.

I should also add he got his wallet back from the barman a day later.
 






Mackenzie

Old Brightonian
Nov 7, 2003
33,508
East Wales
Gordon Terrace.
Ok not the best of areas granted but by no means a whore area.
Lots of big houses converted into flats, maybe she lived in one of those.
The whore area is Millbay docks (outside Bathwick Tyres to be accurate) but this road is a long way from there.
She was 'orrible, early twenties with scabs in her face (is that a sign of a heroin user?)
But this one was actually running down the middle of the road shouting at me to stop as I was pulling away (no pun intended)
It was 1pm maybe she had just woken up and needed a fix.
Feel free to Google map Gordon Terrace.
My brother had a flat in Gordon Terrace....
 


Buzzer

Languidly Clinical
Oct 1, 2006
26,121
Another time I was walking with mates from Southampton Institute where my mate's girlfriend was studying into Southampton city centre and it took us past the back of Tescos. It was cold, it was a Friday night in the middle of November and I could see these women all shivering in the cold together. I turned to my mates and said that if those checkout girls' husbands didn't pick them up soon they'd all freeze. I had to do a double take when I was told they were all ladies of the night. They (the hookers) told me to eff off and stop staring.

Influenced no doubt by how Hollywood portrayed them but I was genuinely expecting half-decent, dare-I-say-it sexy looking women with fishnet stockings and maybe a poodle. I wasn't expecting them to look like moonlighting dinner ladies.
 






JC Footy Genius

Bringer of TRUTH
Jun 9, 2015
10,568
I (vaguely) remember a trip to Amsterdam where Window shopping was a very different experience. So many tastes catered for with some surprisingly fine looking displays.
 


Cheshire Cat

The most curious thing..
Stopped at traffic lights in Liverpool one hot day some years ago, going home round the back of the University, and a girl tried to climb in through the open sun roof of the car. Definitely a druggie. I couldn't get away fast enough.

Before the redevelopments round there, there also used to be several pro's hanging round the bus stops. From the back and from a long distance they looked reasonable, but as you got closer and as soon as they turned round :sick:. I've seen better looking corpses.
 



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