Grief tourists and the Diana Syndrome...

The Clamp · Jun 21, 2017

I'm certainly all for raising money for victims and survivors of any tragedy but are we all getting a bit carried away with the public displays of grief and "solidarity". My hunch is people would not be doing such things as "roses for Ramadan" if they weren't guaranteed some kind of news or social media coverage.

I dunno, maybe I'm being too harsh but I want to hear the stories of what's really happening with enquiries, the stories of the emergency services. I want real news.
Since the death of Diana I do not like the way a large chunk of our nation handles public grief. I find it distasteful and frankly embarrassing.

Thoughts on the matter?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-40343485

BBassic · Jun 21, 2017

If people are feeling an emotion and they want to process it by expressing it in public then more power to them.

wolfie · Jun 21, 2017

The Clamp said:
I'm certainly all for raising money for victims and survivors of any tragedy but are we all getting a bit carried away with the public displays of grief and "solidarity". My hunch is people would not be doing such things as "roses for Ramadan" if they weren't guaranteed some kind of news or social media coverage.

I dunno, maybe I'm being too harsh but I want to hear the stories of what's really happening with enquiries, the stories of the emergency services. I want real news.
Since the death of Diana I do not like the way a large chunk of our nation handles public grief. I find it distasteful and frankly embarrassing.

Thoughts on the matter?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-40343485

I have to agree with this.

The Clamp · Jun 21, 2017

BBassic said:
If people are feeling an emotion and they want to process it by expressing it in public then more power to them.

I understand that. I think I'm just more inclined to a dignified silence approach. Not denying the emotion but not making a three ring touring circus out of it either.

Bold Seagull · Jun 21, 2017

I find it easier to accept than people venting anger, hate and division on internet forums.

BUTTERBALL · Jun 21, 2017

No probs with people paying their respects.

BBassic · Jun 21, 2017

The Clamp said:
I understand that. I think I'm just more inclined to a dignified silence approach. Not denying the emotion but not making a three ring touring circus out of it either.

Same as everything really; we all have different ways of dealing with things. Personally I'm like you, I'm very much a 'grieve in private' kinda bloke but others aren't and that's fine.

loz · Jun 21, 2017

100% this.

When the last North Korean leader died the news over hear were taking the piss of the nations public display of grief, now we are just as bad!!

The Clamp · Jun 21, 2017

Bold Seagull said:
I find it easier to accept than people venting anger, hate and division on internet forums.

Who doesn't? Just because I don't agree with these over the top displays it doesn't mean I want to read people arguing about it on the internet.

Eeyore · Jun 21, 2017

Fail to see anything distasteful in what local folk have done there.

BigGully · Jun 21, 2017

One thing I am never too sure of is the financial donations, I had always thought that everyone whether your injured through an atrocity or not should receive comparable care whilst accepting how perhaps modified stuff/other medical interventions not offered by the NHS might be helpful and cost money, but beyond that I cannot see why giving someone money outside of the necessity to access extra care or helpful stuff is considered appropriate and deemed a worthy grief reaction.

Dr. Notthenineo'clocknews · Jun 21, 2017

I get embarrassed by people getting embarrassed by what other people do.

Let's do our own thing and let other people do theirs.

Bold Seagull · Jun 21, 2017

The Clamp said:
Who doesn't? Just because I don't agree with these over the top displays it doesn't mean I want to read people arguing about it on the internet.

It's some people's way of fighting back, I don't actually see it as a public sign of grief, more of solidarity. We are pretty helpless against terrorism as civilians, so coming together to show we won't be divided or scared I think is perhaps a powerful message if only to each other.

Can understand it's not everyone's cup of tea, but equally can see why it happens. I'm not sure it is the same as the mourning for Diana, I think we are feeling generally as a society, that perhaps we are losing touch with our sense of community, knowing our neighbours, attending community events etc. and so there is this desire to want to embrace that when something happens. You know, for completely different reasons it felt like that in Brighton this year with the promotion, flags and banners up around the city, then a great turn out for the parade - people do want to share in stuff, turn out when we have something to celebrate, but equally too if the community has something to commiserate like how our community felt and reacted with the Shoreham Air disaster.

carlzeiss · Jun 21, 2017

Perhaps the last day of ramadan could become an annual public holiday as a mark of respect to the victims of the Finsbury park terror attack .

BigGully · Jun 21, 2017

Dr. Notthenineo'clocknews said:
I get embarrassed by people getting embarrassed by what other people do.

Let's do our own thing and let other people do theirs.

Who is embarrassed and who is saying that they shouldn't be allowed to do it ?

LVGull · Jun 21, 2017

carlzeiss said:
Perhaps the last day of ramadan could become an annual public holiday as a mark of respect to the victims of the Finsbury park terror attack .

If we did this after every attack, we would never work?
Ridiculous comment.

FamilyGuy · Jun 21, 2017

wolfie said:
I have to agree with this.

Me too.

BBassic · Jun 21, 2017

LVGull said:
If we did this after every attack, we would never work?
Ridiculous comment.

I dunno, sounds alright to me considering we still get paid for public holidays.

The Clamp · Jun 21, 2017

Perhaps the roses for Ramadan was a poor example. It is more solidarity and it's their community. Although I question extending the hand of friendship too readily to a Muslim community that allowed Abu Hamza to use their mosque to recruit extremists and promote death to westerners but hey ho, if a bunch of roses from the Co-Op helps everyone get along far be it from me to judge.

Don't look at it as losing your hands but as gaining hooks.

Thunder Bolt · Jun 21, 2017

You're not looking in the right places. I've read quite a few stories about the emergency services, like the pregnant firefighter, who carried a survivor out of the tower, another female firefighter who was only 5 days out of her training.
I also read a blog from a firefighter who was there for 20 hours, slept for three and then went back.

I also like to read of kindness like the Sikh community who drove down from Birmingham with clothing for the survivors.

Maybe, instead of whinging about other people on NSC, you could do something useful yourself.

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