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Christmas meal dillemma



Shropshire Seagull

Well-known member
Nov 5, 2004
8,496
Telford
I'd never have asked my work colleagues to pay for my meal.

Yeah, agree wit that - bit too cheeky me thinks.


Stories like this remind me why I stopped being a permie and went contracting 10 years ago ....

As project manager I took my team of 12 out and paid for them all to go 10-pin bowling, free beer all night [most were driving so didn't take the piss] and a couple of sharing platters for 6.

It was a Tues 50% off night so probably cost me about £150 - but was great team-building and now I can ask them to work late and they're way more willing.

Carrot works better than stick IMHO ...
 




dadams2k11

ID10T Error
Jun 24, 2011
4,947
Brighton
Tbh, I would get a bit peed off if I was paying for someone's meal and I didn't know about it. Fair enough if you were upfront with me I wouldn't mind.

Like others have said, do the others know they are paying for your meal? They will probably find out i would guess as I'm sure said women as done the rounds and let the others know.
 


Meade's Ball

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
13,612
Hither (sometimes Thither)
Thanks to freedom of information requests, my employer has gotten rid of our annual magician and, most hurtfully, free wine for our Christmas meal'n'do. They were asked how much of the Christmas budget would be on alcohol and that question has made them want to answer ZERO, when historically it's probably rather more than we'd wish anyone to know. Maybe it's fair enough to keep our public image in order, but to know that it'll now be a rather flat affair with 70% of staff with a cheeky bottle in their pockets to pour into the free soft drinks, and that that woman from finance won't be unconscious on the stairs at 2.15pm again sort of makes its unchristmassy.
 


Hugh Jorgan

Active member
Jul 30, 2008
230
Brighton
I've organized countless xmas meals in the past and would never dream of charging extra to pay for my meal. Fair enough about the tip but you should have been up front about it. You might have got away with them paying for your meal but you should have told them all first. Does anyone else realize they're paying for your meai?

As for the hag, I suspect every workplace has one so don't lose any sleep over it. The problem here is that you tried to get yourself a freebie.

It isn't hard sourcing venues. Christ, you only need a pub or hotel that does a xmas menu and can cater for 32. Loads around.

At the end of the day, if you had been fed up organizing it then you should have passed it on to someone else.

Shows how we all have different opinions on things but if a colleague of mine was organising a meal for 30+ people I would fully expect to pay for their meal although I accept the OP could of been clearer from the outset.
 


drew

Drew
Oct 3, 2006
23,053
Burgess Hill
Shows how we all have different opinions on things but if a colleague of mine was organising a meal for 30+ people I would fully expect to pay for their meal although I accept the OP could of been clearer from the outset.

If they had said up front then I probably wouldn't mind but personally I would not expect everyone else to pay for mine when I organize things. Problem here seems to be the underhand way of getting a freebie.
 




Mr Putdown

Well-known member
Jan 26, 2004
2,899
Christchurch
The pub is 15 minutes in each direction, there goes my lunch break on, so far, seven occasions, so it is not all in work time.

Why on earth would you need to visit a venue for a works Christmas dinner seven times?

Christ I only visited the venue for my wedding reception once and that was for four times as many people!
 


drew

Drew
Oct 3, 2006
23,053
Burgess Hill
Why on earth would you need to visit a venue for a works Christmas dinner seven times?

Christ I only visited the venue for my wedding reception once and that was for four times as many people!

Agree with this. Fail to see why you need to visit unless you are trying out the food. Jesus, it's a works xmas do for just 32 people. You ring the venue, check availability, collect a deposit from staff. One visit to pay the deposit (probably could even do it online) then email through the food choices. Possibly one other visit to pay the balance. Mountain and molehill spring to mind.
 


Goldstone1976

We Got Calde in!!
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patron
Apr 30, 2013
13,784
Herts
I've noticed that threads that start with the OP saying "I've done X and somebody has complained. What do you think?" invariably end up with the majority of posters siding with the complainant.

Nothing more to add, really. Just an observation.
 




Blue Valkyrie

Not seen such Bravery!
Sep 1, 2012
32,165
Valhalla
'Resign' from organising it in future and let HR do it.

Organise your own additional meal next year but only for those you want to invite.

Drop the idea of a free meal.
 


drew

Drew
Oct 3, 2006
23,053
Burgess Hill
I've noticed that threads that start with the OP saying "I've done X and somebody has complained. What do you think?" invariably end up with the majority of posters siding with the complainant.

Nothing more to add, really. Just an observation.

Probably the underlying theme is that the OPs know they are in the wrong and posting on here is a last desperate attempt for vindication of their actions which, it seems, does not come that frequently!!!
 


See-Goals

DIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE
Aug 13, 2004
1,172
Seaford
Why is everyone talking about HR!

I've worked in HR for 16 years, if someone complained that a member of their team has withdrawn as 'chief lunch organiser' they would be laughed at out the building.
 




pasty

A different kind of pasty
Jul 5, 2003
30,272
West, West, West Sussex
It's Christmas! An endless amount of expenditure goes towards celebrating with people you don't overly like nor would you choose to socialise with throughout the rest of the year.

Big fat this. Fortunately I am away in Berlin the night of my office do this year :clap:
 


Tarpon

Well-known member
Sep 12, 2013
3,785
BN1
Keep the admin fee the same but increase the tip: £40 from 32 people is pitiful unless the meal is costing next to nothing.
Tell the complainant the cost is unchanged and email everyone to explain this & that you will not be organising it again. Add that if anyone is unhappy they need to find their own replacement for the meal to get their deposit back & let you know.
 






drew

Drew
Oct 3, 2006
23,053
Burgess Hill
It's Christmas! An endless amount of expenditure goes towards celebrating with people you don't overly like nor would you choose to socialise with throughout the rest of the year.

So are you saying you never socialise with anyone you work with at all?
 


Dick Head

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Jan 3, 2010
13,632
Quaxxann
Why on earth would you need to visit a venue for a works Christmas dinner seven times?

Christ I only visited the venue for my wedding reception once and that was for four times as many people!

Seven liquid lunches.
 


dazzer6666

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Mar 27, 2013
52,400
Burgess Hill
Wouldn't have tried to slip in a freebie for myself, think that's taking the piss............but now it's blown up you're going to look a bit of a tit whatever you do.

Bin it ? Petulant action.....
Drop the freebie ? Climbdown
Carry on as planned ? Old hag will cause problems, possibly winding others up as well

No idea why you've needed to go to the venue so many times

In your situation I'd drop the freebie (say it's all tip - your £40 is miserly anyway) and never organise another one. Don't say anything, just don't do it next time.

Whatever happens, if any of your attending workmates are on NSC, afraid to say there is a good chance you might end up on another thread [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]
 


Pevenseagull

Anti-greed coalition
Jul 20, 2003
19,614
Refund all money and cancel the event and then make it known why and who was responsible. Then arrange another one as an informal meal nothing official with the people you chose and would like to go with.

100% the first part but don't bother arranging anything else just go out on the piss with the handful of people who you can actually stand being in the same room with ...... If it's anything like the offices I used to work in out of 32 people there are probably about 4 that are alright.
 
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Herr Tubthumper

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
59,523
The Fatherland


Feb 23, 2009
22,996
Brighton factually.....
So, for years I have organised the office meal. Half day off for those who attend and what started off at just 8 has escalated to 32 for the last couple of years.
Quite a bit of work goes into it, sourcing venue, collecting and paying deposits, communicating fayre with pub, collecting balance and providing attendees with the food choice on the day cos they get pissed or rabbit too much.
Now I have never asked for anything just a pint or two maybe, however this year I thought i would charge a couple of quid extra to cover a £40 tip and pay for my meal, I communictaed this as an "admin fee".
So today I ask for food choice and balance and I get one old hag (who has a gripe with me anyway) question the "admin fee" and after telling her, she refused to pay full cost, i.e. the extra couple of quid.
Fair enough I will give you back your deposit and someone can take your place I tell her.
Well after "copy all" to 32 she accuses me of work place bullying and unless I reinstate her at the price she is willing to pay i should expect a call from H R.
I am inclined to reinstate her, tell everyone to pay the price of the meal only , sort your own tips out, pay the pub the balance and **** off home.

What would you do?

In fairness sneaking in a your meal for free would actually upset me a little if I found out, unless you were forthright from the start, then I could actually make that decision when you send your RSVP.
However I would not send an email and threaten to contact HR, that is something you just don't do. I would imagine they already know due to the fact at least 1 out of those 32 ermails sent went to someone in HR anyway.

The very fact she has done this suggests she is a special type of person who either has a gripe against you from the get go, or is the office retard and if that is the case no one likes her anyway so who gives a feck.

Seriously your only options are to collect all the money and do a runner or go round to everyone and explain the situation face to face and make your call from there if people still want you to proceed with the festivities....

Enjoy the meal, sounds like its gonna be blast...
 


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