Relative with dementia, advice required please

Hillian1 · Mar 12, 2016

Seriously need any advice please.

Here's the problem.

My wife's Aunt was admitted to hospital 6 weeks ago after it became obvious she had early signs of dementia, she lives alone in Somerset having been widowed in 2009, there were no children. This makes wife's Mum next of kin but she is 85 and although sound of mind she asked us to help with things which of course we agreed to.

Here's where it gets messy.
She had agreed to myself and my wife becoming power of attorney, albeit verbally, and we were in the process of setting this up when the hospital issued a Deprivation of Liberty order, this means they have decided she no longer has the mental capacity to make decisions, scuppering the whole power of attorney application.

This morning we have made calls to her bank to try and transfer some of her money from one account which is loaded to another, at the same branch, which is overdrawn where all her direct debits come out and were politely told to **** off. The charges are racking up, but we have no way of stopping it and this will no doubt end with debt collection companies being involved.

Anyone know where I even start?

Thanks in advance.

Goldstone1976 · Mar 12, 2016

Firstly - sympathies for what is a totally shit situation for everyone involved.

I've had a similar situation. Suggest you google "Court of Protection" and "Deputy". The process is not pain-free and too slow, but it does work. You'll have to remember that the Court's primary concern is what is best for the person whose assets someone else (who hasn't been previously been authorised) is trying to access. The whole area is wide open to abuse by unscrupulous people - the Court knows this and takes that responsibility seriously...

Thunder Bolt · Mar 12, 2016

I would go to the CAB to get advice and ask them to talk to Social Services. The whole financial thing will need to be sorted out especially if she is going into residential care.
Fortunately my brother had sorted out POA, just before my Mum collapsed and was admitted to hospital.

AmexRuislip · Mar 12, 2016

As mentioned above, its very good advice.
My aunt suffered greatly from dementia, and because she had not made a will after my uncle died, her son had great problems accessing her funds for aftercare.
He took the above steps with great success.

glasfryn · Mar 12, 2016

Thunder Bolt said:
I would go to the CAB to get advice and ask them to talk to Social Services. The whole financial thing will need to be sorted out especially if she is going into residential care.
Fortunately my brother had sorted out POA, just before my Mum collapsed and was admitted to hospital.

this ..........and contact Age concern, someone there will know the law and what and what not to do,
locally I have heard the same story she tried a AC and they sorted a lot of it but tread carefully
fortunately things have changed, my Mum was admitted to a psychiatric hospital (they did in those days)
be lucky

Hillian1 · Mar 12, 2016

Goldstone1976 said:
Firstly - sympathies for what is a totally shit situation for everyone involved.

I've had a similar situation. Suggest you google "Court of Protection" and "Deputy". The process is not pain-free and too slow, but it does work. You'll have to remember that the Court's primary concern is what is best for the person whose assets someone else (who hasn't been previously been authorised) is trying to access. The whole area is wide open to abuse by unscrupulous people - the Court knows this and takes that responsibility seriously...

Yes, the deputy thing is where we are going next, but that can take months and we need to sort something quickly.

It's ironic really that 15 of the dd's are charities she always gave to.

Lord Bracknell · Mar 12, 2016

As well as the CAB, there is also advice available from Age UK. The Brighton number is 01273 720603.

LamieRobertson · Mar 12, 2016

Can't add anything to the above but offer you best wishes ..my mother suffered from dementia in her later years so I know what it's like.

PS ..whilst u sort things out i would either visit the bank branch in question or either put something in writing ..it's a tad harder for them to be so dismissive

Soulman · Mar 12, 2016

Good advice given, my stepfather had Alzheimer's and my Mum was able to sort things out fairly quickly. I would try all the options given as you need this problem sorted asap.
Perhaps an appointment with a local branch manager of your wife's Aunts bank account to get the problem on record. I had a similar (though no way related to this problem) problem and the bank stopped cash being with drawn from an account, the manager stated that as i had reported it that he had to take action.
Good luck as well for the future.

KZNSeagull · Mar 12, 2016

I agree with Lamie. I would visit the branch with the order from the hospital - whilst they may not allow you to transfer money or indeed refuse to discuss financial details with you at all, they may put a stop on direct debits etc on the account that is overdrawn until at least something else is sorted out. All of her accounts with that bank will be linked in some way, so they will already know that something unusual is happening.

Hillian1 · Mar 12, 2016

Thank you for the replies.
It never occurred to me about Age Concern, will try them next.

Hillian1 · Mar 12, 2016

LamieRobertson said:
Can't add anything to the above but offer you best wishes ..my mother suffered from dementia in her later years so I know what it's like.

PS ..whilst u sort things out i would either visit the bank branch in question or either put something in writing ..it's a tad harder for them to be so dismissive

Bugger, we were down there this week trying to find all her statements, which we did hence knowing about her being overdrawn in one account, never occurred to us to go to see her bank in person.

KZNSeagull · Mar 12, 2016

Hillian1 said:
Bugger, we were down there this week trying to find all her statements, which we did hence knowing about her being overdrawn in one account, never occurred to us to go to see her bank in person.

Definitely go. But take a letter with you detailing the issue and also take a copy of the hospital order. Like I said earlier, they may not want to discuss it with you, but at least you know that they have been informed.

happypig · Mar 12, 2016

I would also contact the council/utilities and ask them to put her account on hold until you can get the finances sorted. Some councils are very quick to take action if a DD goes unpaid (I've seen people in court for missing a couple of payments).

Alternatively can you/someone pay moeny into her account to cover her essentials for a couple of months ?

Thunder Bolt · Mar 12, 2016

DWP need to know that she's in hospital after two weeks if she was receiving any sort of benefits, although her state pension is unaffected.

spongy · Mar 12, 2016

Can you not get in contact with all the companies that the DD's go to? Ask them to stop from their end rather than the bank? They may not be able to speak to you as youre not the account holder but they may put any debts or arrears on hold.

drew · Mar 12, 2016

Hillian1 said:
Bugger, we were down there this week trying to find all her statements, which we did hence knowing about her being overdrawn in one account, never occurred to us to go to see her bank in person.

Perhaps start with a visit to a branch of her bank that is local to you. Find out from them what it is in terms of documentation that they would accept to allow you to act. Also, if you have home insurance there's a good chance you pay for legal protection which normally includes a fee advice line.

drew · Mar 12, 2016

spongy said:
Can you not get in contact with all the companies that the DD's go to? Ask them to stop from their end rather than the bank? They may not be able to speak to you as youre not the account holder but they may put any debts or arrears on hold.

That's not a bad idea, especially the charities as it wouldn't look good on them if they drained funds from a generous elderly contributor resulting in unnecessary bank charges.

Super Steve Earle · Mar 12, 2016

Hillian1 said:
Bugger, we were down there this week trying to find all her statements, which we did hence knowing about her being overdrawn in one account, never occurred to us to go to see her bank in person.

drew said:
Perhaps start with a visit to a branch of her bank that is local to you. Find out from them what it is in terms of documentation that they would accept to allow you to act. Also, if you have home insurance there's a good chance you pay for legal protection which normally includes a fee advice line.

This is likely to be part of the answer, in other words visit any branch convenient to you. Domicile of the account doesn't matter so much theses days. But I doubt you will be able to produce anything to allow you to act as legally you have no right to do so. However ask them to check their rules or with their legal dep't as you may be able to persuade them to transfer funds from the savings account to cover certain Direct Debits. They should have already blocked the account by now and I would suggest you probably need to go to Court of Protection next.

Biscuit · Mar 12, 2016

I'm afraid I can't offer much advice on the legal situation, but on the dementia itself - you say she was only admitted six weeks ago and it's early stages? Have you considered Souvenaid? It's a drink that you take daily which some people believe can make a real difference. You'll need to ask your Doctor or Pharmacist to prescribe it, but then it's relatively easy to get hold of.

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