Workplace woes - The most dullest courses in the world ever.

Grombleton · Oct 14, 2014

tinycowboy said:
Can't agree with this. Donoghue v Stephenson? Carlill v Carbolic Smoke Ball Company? Love these guys.......

Had those one drilled in to me during my A Level Law course. You sadly never forget them. Good craic at the time though. Only Law can give you information about some weird shit that goes on in the world but somehow has a massive effect on how we go about our day.

tinycowboy · Oct 14, 2014

Buzzer said:
Ah. You misunderstand. I love a bit of Case Law as much as the next man. It's the rules regarding incorporation, what defines a quorum, filing days after year end etc......zzzzzzzz

OK - yeah, I agree. Don't tell [MENTION=19864]Flex Your Head[/MENTION] though - that's his life.......

The Large One · Oct 14, 2014

I was on a day-long course about photography, and how we should have been making greater use of iconic images of Michael Caine, Twiggy, Terence Stamp etc. in order to make our magazines look better and more attractive. Sadly, the subject matter of our magazines were wood carving and furniture making. It was an excrutiating waste of time.

However, after reading some of the experiences on here, you lot have knocked my ennui into a cocked hat. You win. :bowdown:

hans kraay fan club · Oct 14, 2014

One of my responsibilities in our organisation, is for the Quality Management System / ISO certification.

A significant chunk of my annual bonus is dependant on us succesfully achieving re-certification each year, so I can't ignore it, but my GOD it is dull.

As anyone who has ever had training in this area will testify.

The Spanish · Oct 14, 2014

a recent cross cultural traing course was a highlight. was like an episode of mind your language, everyone cartoonishly sticking to national stereotypes.

WATFORD zero · Oct 14, 2014

hans kraay fan club said:
One of my responsibilities in our organisation, is for the Quality Management System / ISO certification.

A significant chunk of my annual bonus is dependant on us succesfully achieving re-certification each year, so I can't ignore it, but my GOD it is dull.

As anyone who has ever had training in this area will testify.

Do what I used to - contract it out with the brief 'get the certification, but please keep the number of changes of practice, interruptions etc to the people who work here to an absolute minimum'

Job's a good 'un :thumbsup:

Brian Fantana · Oct 14, 2014

hans kraay fan club said:
One of my responsibilities in our organisation, is for the Quality Management System / ISO certification.

A significant chunk of my annual bonus is dependant on us succesfully achieving re-certification each year, so I can't ignore it, but my GOD it is dull.

As anyone who has ever had training in this area will testify.

My wife has exactly the same role at her company. There is a weird dullness-importance ratio with a lot of this stuff!

Moshe Gariani · Oct 14, 2014

How many others are currently in the midst of a staggeringly dull "conference", "workshop" or "training event" ...!!!!

We are on the first of a two day standardisation event for apprenticeship assessors. Half an hour in and the flip chart sheets are already up on the big clip thing running the length of the wall like a depressing washing line.

The great news is that we have an external health and safety speaker coming in tomorrow.

NSC comes into its own. Years ago presumably it would have been the Telegraph crossword...

Surf's Up · Oct 14, 2014

Moshe Gariani said:
How many others are currently in the midst of a staggeringly dull "conference", "workshop" or "training event" ...!!!!

We are on the first of a two day standardisation event for apprenticeship assessors. Half an hour in and the flip chart sheets are already up on the big clip thing running the length of the wall like a depressing washing line.

The great news is that we have an external health and safety speaker coming in tomorrow.

NSC comes into its own. Years ago presumably it would have been the Telegraph crossword...

If you think the Health and Safety session tomorrow is going to relieve the tedium .............. !!!

hans kraay fan club · Oct 14, 2014

WATFORD zero said:
Do what I used to - contract it out with the brief 'get the certification, but please keep the number of changes of practice, interruptions etc to the people who work here to an absolute minimum'

Job's a good 'un

I'm not allowed to contract out the whole thing. I do get a consultant in 3 times a year to carry out all our internal audits though, and to chair the obligatory 'Management Review Meeting'. I kind of HAVE to get him in though - our office team is so small that I am personally responsible for at least 70% of the areas being auditted, so I'm not 'allowed' to be the auditor and auditee.

Jesus - I'm bored even thinking about it.

Moshe Gariani · Oct 14, 2014

hans kraay fan club said:
Jesus - I'm bored even thinking about it.

Quite.

Moshe Gariani · Oct 14, 2014

gibseagull said:
If you think the Health and Safety session tomorrow is going to relieve the tedium .............. !!!

The "competition" on the conference programme is provided by "Learning Styles" or "Equality and Diversity"...

WATFORD zero · Oct 14, 2014

hans kraay fan club said:
I do get a consultant in 3 times a year to carry out all our internal audits though, and to chair the obligatory 'Management Review Meeting'.

Could be worse - the big financial institutions internal audit departments were a nightmare.

They sat on the hill watching the battle from afar, and when you had finally won, they would come down and shoot all our own survivors :nono:

Back to the point, 25 years of various dreadful courses covering subjects that were so boring i can't even remember what they were for. A couple of bright interludes with a few of us (when much younger/fitter/ambitious) running around Dartmoor and a couple of small villages in the west country, capturing 'escaped prisoners' and racing round in Landrovers. Can't remember what they were for either but it was aforementioned financial institutions so probably something to do with banking or IT :yawn:

Norman Potting · Oct 14, 2014

tinycowboy said:
Can't agree with this. Donoghue v Stephenson? Carlill v Carbolic Smoke Ball Company? Love these guys.......

35 years - ish after I first heard about Carlill and the Carbolid Smoke Ball Company and it hasn't changed my life. We had a wonderful law lecturer at college, a mad scouser who managed to make it entertaining. His advice in exams was to make up some case names if you couldn't remember as the examiner would probably give you the benefit of the doubt as there are so many!

tinycowboy · Oct 14, 2014

Norman Potting said:
35 years - ish after I first heard about Carlill and the Carbolid Smoke Ball Company and it hasn't changed my life. We had a wonderful law lecturer at college, a mad scouser who managed to make it entertaining. His advice in exams was to make up some case names if you couldn't remember as the examiner would probably give you the benefit of the doubt as there are so many!

Re Carlill changing your life: maybe not, as you would think that, generally speaking, false advertising would have been outlawed at some point anyway, but it set the (smoke) ball rolling. As Buzzer says somewhere above, the case law can be fascinating, but other requirements of company law are pretty mundane.

The Fifth Column · Oct 14, 2014

hans kraay fan club said:
I'm not allowed to contract out the whole thing. I do get a consultant in 3 times a year to carry out all our internal audits though, and to chair the obligatory 'Management Review Meeting'. I kind of HAVE to get him in though - our office team is so small that I am personally responsible for at least 70% of the areas being auditted, so I'm not 'allowed' to be the auditor and auditee.

Jesus - I'm bored even thinking about it.

You sound like you have the dullest most soul destroying job in the world!

Hillian1 · Oct 14, 2014

Just last week, we had a Royal Mail run course at our place.

We were shown how to take our customers on a journey, a journey of adventure and discovery.

The term "Customer Journey" was used in almost every sentence.

I have no idea how I didn't get up and shout obscenities at the spotty Marketing "guru".

Buzzer · Oct 14, 2014

Hillian1 said:
were shown how to take our customers on a journey, a journey of adventure and discovery.

Isn't that the start to Eric B and Rakim's Paid In Full?

Jam The Man · Oct 14, 2014

By and large I am an IT trainer, and have to say that PowerPoint can be pretty useful IF used appropriately as part of a blended learning approach.
I cringe at how i've seen some training packages put together.
For starters, the presenters / teachers / trainers really ought to do some basic research when using resources like PowerPoint if they are potentially presenting to dyslexics for example. Regardless of whether you know you have such students, the presentation should always be all inclusive.

chamakh_attack · Oct 14, 2014

E-learning is the way forward. Dip in and out when it suits you. Much more cost effective too.

Got something to say or just want fewer pesky ads? Join us... 😊

Workplace woes - The most dullest courses in the world ever.

Surrounded by <div>s

Well-known member

Who's Next?

The voice of reason.

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

The voice of reason.

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Retired ex-cop

( . ) ( . )

Languidly Clinical

Well-known member

New member

Share this page