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  1. #2401
    Staring at the rude boys happypig's Avatar
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    1 Not allowed!
    Quote Originally Posted by Easy 10 View Post
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    What an almighty great hefty 24 carat slab of meaningless corporate OMNIBOLLOCKS.

    Just the words "workshop", "interactive" and "engaging" has me breaking out in pus-filled BOILS of pure unaldulterated ANGST. I would literally rather hack my own bellend off with a rusty teaspoon than attend so much as 45 minutes of this cataclysmic clusterfvck of abject corporate dullard brainwashing.

    I mean what, in the name of holy FRIG, is "silo working" anyway ? If you actually know - don't tell me. I don't give a shit, and you will be dead to me.
    I'll put you down for the engagement focus event shall I ?
    "Nibbled to death by an okapi..."

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    • #2402

      1 Not allowed!
      Quote Originally Posted by edna krabappel View Post
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      if I dropped the contents of a Maltesers bag on the office carpet, I freely admit I'd be considering the old Five Second Rule, and possibly even contemplating extending it to ten seconds.
      The Five Second Rule is a real thing...SCIENCE says so. http://www.standard.co.uk/news/healt...-a3489887.html
    • #2403
      Members Bigtomfu's Avatar
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      0 Not allowed!
      Quote Originally Posted by Lower West Stander View Post
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      A slightly different angle last night.

      I was on my way home on the train and my eyes were drawn to the work the guy sitting next to me was doing.

      He was classic Laptop Train Man. His laptop was the size of a mini PC and he was hammering away at the keys doing a PowerPoint slide.

      He was doing the same slide for an hour and it was awful. I won't mention the company but the main point of the slide was "to increase market penetration from 30 to 32%"

      There followed a list of bullet points Steve Austin would not have been able to read with a bionic eye.

      I left him to it. Poor sods at that presentation will have rough time.


      Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
      If BC had a sponsor it would surely be Berocca.

      The above would fit very nicely as a scene for their new advert and could be made even better by a cut away to said BC back at home cooking the dinner with one hand, feeding the kids with his other and sweeping the floor with a broom deposited in his favourite orifice.

      "You but on a really good day"


      CHUFF off you utter bunch of CJTCs.
    • #2404

      0 Not allowed!
      Quote Originally Posted by Lower West Stander View Post
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      There followed a list of bullet points Steve Austin would not have been able to read with a bionic eye.


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    • #2405
      The voice of reason. hans kraay fan club's Avatar
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      0 Not allowed!
      Quote Originally Posted by edna krabappel View Post
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      Hmmmm. There is little doubt this lady is occupying a prominent position in the all-time League of Bellcheesery.

      However. Call me a RIGHT OLD TRAMP, but if I dropped the contents of a Maltesers bag on the office carpet, I freely admit I'd be considering the old Five Second Rule, and possibly even contemplating extending it to ten seconds. It's not like she's dropped them on the floor of a public toilet, or even on the pavement outside, I assume. It's just the carpet. And it's an ENTIRE BAG of precious chocolate.

      Maybe it's because you're a CHAP, that your understanding of the need for chocolate is slightly lacking. Or maybe you just work in a FILTHY office. But I've got to say- sorry, by the way- on this one, I think I'm with her. We all need a few germs to keep us strong, right? And a fair bit of chocolate.
      @edna krabappel - I KNOW you, and know that you're NOT a TRAMP. It is an office, but not a plush office in a smart office block. Its a mezzanine office in a light industrial unit, with the original carpet from when we moved in in 1997. I can safely call it, that you would NOT have eaten them.
      The above post is simply my opinion. I am not bullying you, should it differ from your own.
    • #2406
      Super Moderator edna krabappel's Avatar
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      0 Not allowed!
      Quote Originally Posted by hans kraay fan club View Post
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      @edna krabappel - I KNOW you, and know that you're NOT a TRAMP. It is an office, but not a plush office in a smart office block. Its a mezzanine office in a light industrial unit, with the original carpet from when we moved in in 1997. I can safely call it, that you would NOT have eaten them.
      Understood. I'm glad we've cleared that up
      The lady has foolishly attempted to join the conversation with a wild and dangerous opinion of her own. What half-baked drivel! See how the men look at her with utter contempt.
    • #2407
      Members blue'n'white's Avatar
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      0 Not allowed!
      I was intrigued enough by the mention of "silo working" to look it up on Google - it's management bolleaux of the highest order
      And no I'm not going to pretend to care what it means but it is utter
      We learned more from a three minute record baby than we ever learned in school
    • #2408
      HellBilly Psychobilly freakout's Avatar
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      0 Not allowed!
      Been told that this is not an appropriate screensaver at work today, I would not mind but customers cannot see it clearly from the counter.....

      Time to move on....
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      PsYcHoBiLlY fReAkOuT "Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law"
    • #2409
      Ex-Gibseagull Surf's Up's Avatar
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      0 Not allowed!
      Quote Originally Posted by edna krabappel View Post
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      Hmmmm. There is little doubt this lady is occupying a prominent position in the all-time League of Bellcheesery.

      However. Call me a RIGHT OLD TRAMP, but if I dropped the contents of a Maltesers bag on the office carpet, I freely admit I'd be considering the old Five Second Rule, and possibly even contemplating extending it to ten seconds. It's not like she's dropped them on the floor of a public toilet, or even on the pavement outside, I assume. It's just the carpet. And it's an ENTIRE BAG of precious chocolate.

      Maybe it's because you're a CHAP, that your understanding of the need for chocolate is slightly lacking. Or maybe you just work in a FILTHY office. But I've got to say- sorry, by the way- on this one, I think I'm with her. We all need a few germs to keep us strong, right? And a fair bit of chocolate.
      Its finally, and perhaps some may say inevitably, happening .... Edna is morphing into Enrest
      برايتون حتى أموت
    • #2410
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      0 Not allowed!
      Quote Originally Posted by Bodian View Post
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      Looking forward to our annual staff conference tomorrow. I seem to have avoided the worst of the corporate bolox 'sessions', namely:

      Mini Olympics of Transformation
      As we continue our journey to become transformational, this workshop will explore through the use of interactive and engaging activities the key themes of transformation including leadership, communication and the avoidance of silo working. This consists of about 6 events, all with a transformation theme.
      It appears to have been about 'Team Building' (making cars out of balloons and cups, and other similar 'bonding experiences') - but with the 'subtle twist' that you had to work with people from other teams.

      I avoided it by going for a walk in the grounds and along the lakeshore with a few colleagues I haven't worked closely with for about six months - which probably did far more for 'cross-team working' than anything organised......

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