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Your call, but doing some English editing using some scripting seems much easier to me than editing text using maths! ... and can be automated...

Isn't what you're trying to do what is known as a 'regular expression' - i.e. a way to automate the tidying of lots of text, and therefore doesn't really require an Excel function at all? This is merely a text function so I'd assume you can export as CSV and perform a suitable regular...