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I know a good gay escort service up their way. Give me a minute.

60 pages. Jesus Christ.

The only bit of possible good news is that AJ's agent came over to England to check out our facilities and the stadium etc. Which shows that his agent thinks it is possible for him to come here, and he didn't just tell us to piss off becuase all these other clubs were interested. Why would he...

If I was AJ's agent, what would be the point of signing the first deal put in front of him? Even if terms with Brighton were agreed, I'd wait around for another week or two at least and see what other options are open, and see if I can get any more wonga.

He's 21, and looks pretty good. Get him in.