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The moneyshot from my hemorrhoids 'banding' procedure occured in the toilets at the cricket ground. It needed their most experienced cleaner and a war poet.

I'm well chuffed with how it's gone so far. Didn't even have a paracetamol this morning. Back home, I haven't enjoyed urinating this much since I pissed obscenities in the snow outside Belotti's house.

All done, local/spinal. Little screen so I could just see the top of the trainee surgeon's head bobbing up and down with lots of sucking noises and in instructions to 'cut deeper'. Great start to the weekend.

Excellent, I couldn't be any worse.

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/transurethral-resection-of-the-prostate-turp/what-happens/ Sounds like a piece of poss .... But I just don't like the sound of it. #little badge on football managers lapels

Having it tomorrow and all of a sudden I am ****ing bricking it.