I hope you're not suggesting that I should let the facts get in the way of a good story. Fortunately I doubt whether Loftus-Cheek will be continuing his development anywhere near Croydon.
It might cheer you up to learn that a priceless opportunity to take the **** out of the small club dropped my way the other day when I was visiting the muddy field and collection of sheds that passes for their training ground on business. I bumped into Ian 'Moose' Abrahams, the self-styled...