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Dicker had superb vision and that magic time on the ball, but he was ponderous when chasing the opposition. I agree though, he was a clever player. CMS always got me, was he fast... or did he just look fast due to his rather all action (silent movie ott school of acting) running style and...

Hey Mo, This thread is really meant to be quite light hearted in its nature. Some of the players mentioned here were great servants and more than made up for lack of pace with other elements of their game. That said, I reckon at 21 I could have taken Gatting over 100m - a much fairer...

Hey Joe, I think it's funnier that you were actually slower than those same middle aged men. As for me, I'm neither overweight nor middle aged, but I am right when I say that you were incredibly, incredibly ****ing slow. ;)

My Albion slow XI: Wayne Henderson Marcos Painter Ross Johnson Gary Hobson Robbie Pethick Gary Dicker George Parris Paul Byrne Darren Currie Ian Baird Ritchie Barker.

Ian Baird - both slow and chronically unfit. He looked like we'd asked the coach driver to play. Pint, pie, cig, goal. And then drive the lads to Blackpool for some quality late evening 'ladies night' action down the pink pussycat. Pickled onions, bowls filled with quavers and roasted...

I remember John Carew out pacing Dicker, he was therefore slower than most living things... indeed more glacial is his movement.

Interesting to read the takes herein re those class older players who seemingly could dictate a game with zero legs... Ray Wilkins of Orient era springs to mind. What is difficult to understand is how a younger pro can be soooo slow. God alone knows how slow Kemy will be at 41 (I think Case made...

Gary Hobson - seemed to play like he was from an alternate dimension where time and space moved at an entirely different pace.

Bas Savage was also surprisingly very slow. With the ball at his feet he seemed to have to slalom from left to right in order to control the ball, which added to the almost comedic slowness at which he moved forwards. There was one episode away at Tranmere I'll never forget. 10 yards clear he...

For me... it has to be Richard 'running through treacle' Barker. I watched a breakaway featuring 'the bear' at Darlington back in the day, and everything went in super slow mo... I'm pretty sure dry ice covered the pitch too and alas I saw it all in real HD his legs were pounding away but he...