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Did I do that? It is more than possible. However, I may have posted a story about getting hauled before a disciplinary panel for sending an email to somone that concluded 'you can't polish a turd'. I got off, and sadly not because you can, in fact, polish a turd. But you have to freeze the...

The big lad with the clumsy ball control - 'First touch' of the Yorkshire ripper Although this thread mostly reminds me of some of the old man's finest expressions: You'll get a clip round the ear 'ole You'll get a thick ear You'll get a clip along side Don't come the old acid and his coup de...