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Targett has been at Fulham for months, and has just declared that nobody from Saints has spoken to him once since he left, despite nearing the end of his current contract. I'd suggest he's available whether Saints go down or not. (Not convinced he's very good though...)

This list is meant as a joke, yes? One player who has been accused of racially abusing our left back, and two with massive attitude problems? I'm glad you're not in charge of recruitment!