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"I like curry, I do. But now that we've got the recipe, is there really any need for them to stay?" "And we've come to the inevitable conclusion that the one course of action that the authorities must take, is to cut off their goolies."

Sir, are you absolutely sure? It does mean changing the bulb.

Tell you what, that crack is very moreish

"Let me tell you something about the Titanic: people forget that on the Titanic's maiden voyage there were over 1000 miles of uneventful, very pleasurable cruising before it hit the iceberg."