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To pass the time between refreshes of the Ali J thread, I've resorted to composing haikus out of my favourite NSC search terms. Here's one for starters: DOGGING NORTH EAST hickstead services how to pronounce bukkake? alan shearer bulge

First verse of this continues to sum up the Crooks situation perfectly.

We were staying on Harris last week and we drove up to Stornoway and saw the butcher's shop (McLeod's) where the world's finest black pudding comes from. Felt a bit like I imagine a trip to Mecca would feel if I had a slightly different belief system/set of priorities. FWIW, other Scottish...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oWxUVGbArc8 Pretty much covers it.

Confirmed on club Twitter now.

Even if we're supposed to believe he was using some sort of super-blu-tac to address the previously discussed practical issues, the whole notion strikes me as highly inadvisable. Leaving aside the problem of trying to see the ball past a madly flapping pheasant, the first time anyone yelled...

Big old no from me - talented but selfish, moody and prone to frequent toys/pram moments. If we're as diligent as we say we are about looking at players' character as well as ability before signing them, we won't even be considering him.

I left one to ripen in the bowl this morning. My girlfriend came home, opened all the windows, flushed it away angrily and chucked me out of the house.

If anyone's trying to stay up all night for the results, they probably shouldn't try to wade all the way through this for fear of dropping off, but I thought I'd post it anyway - my own potted history of how things have got to the point where Scotland might yet choose to break away. (I worked...

At last, a sensible thread on an important issue. Well done the OP. I'll go for their version of Space Oddity, just for the bit that goes "nicky nicky nicky nocky noo, bowwwwm, wackety bonnnnnnng".

I know these were said to be cynical cash-in albums, but that's making it a bit too obvious :lolol:

Some cracking suggestions on this thread. Loving the love for Low in particular. I'm borderline evangelical about the merits of the Phantom Band, and was going to suggest their debut "Checkmate Savage" on this thread. I still listen to it all the time, five years after it came out, and still...

When we beat Pompey in the FA Cup at the Goldstone in the early 90s, I was in the West Stand when Portsmouth put the ball in the net in the last few minutes, and a bunch of their goons ran from the East Stand terraces on to the pitch to taunt the Albion fans. If they'd stayed where they were...

Signed, and shared with the 140-odd members on my club's Facebook group - hope to get some more shares and signatures out of that. (We're also a community club that doesn't own its ground, so it could just as easily happen to us.)

Where to start with this? As others have observed, grave diggers and pall bearers are highly unlikely to be the same individuals. Irrespective of this, if the coffin contained a person of average weight, they'd find it nigh on impossible to carry it for three hours without a break. Surely...

Having lived in Edinburgh for upwards of 13 years now, I'd have to say it's pretty cool. Grew up in Newcastle and love going back there. Agree with the earlier poster about York (especially with a beer by the river on a sunny day). And I like lots of things about Glasgow, though the ever-present...

Quality. Reminds me of a letter someone wrote to the Viz that went something like this: "I note that Andy Cole has announced his retirement from international football. That being the case, I too would like to announce my retirement from international football. And so would my niece."

An unarguable case. Though you neglected to mention: 1. Appearing on the big screen at Reading as we secured our play-off place, as well as appearing several times in the crowd at the same time; and 2. Being Pope.

I admit I'd be quite surprised. I like Brez in lots of respects but ultimately I think he and Casper are decent keepers who are prone to stage fright, and that they'd be much better off as first choices (and potential star players) in a L1/L2 side than as bench-warmers at the Albion.

This was one of my first thoughts when I read the news. Good news for Casper and Brez if so.