Cheese roll or not a cheese roll

[Bozza]

The office is abuzz with yet another controversy.

Dynamic G is eating what Sainsbury describe as a 'Cheese Top Bap' - you know the thing - a roll/bap with a light topping of melted cheese. The bap has not been sliced and has no filling.

Dynamic G maintains that this is a cheese roll.

I, and others, believe that a cheese roll involves slicing a roll in half with cheese (grated or sliced) placed between the two halves of the roll/bap.

So the question is:

Can a cheese top bap, not sliced and with no filling be classified as a cheese roll?

[Meade's_Ball]

Of course not. I sometimes devour them, and at no time do i feel like i am eating a cheese roll. A cheesy-topped bap, perhaps.

[tinx]

A chease Roll must contain some form of proper cheese in the middle. Personally I prefer grated cheese in a cheese roll

A cheese top bap is only a cheese roll if it is cut in half and cheese placed in the middle.

[CHAPPERS]

No way!

A cheese roll does not become a cheese roll until it has been sliced in half and filled with cheese.

A cheese top bap is just that, a cheese top bap. If said bap were cut in half and filled with cheese it would then become a cheese rool.

Tell Dynamic G that he is living a lie.

[Boardy]

This is frankly embarrassing for the Dynamic G, and I expect he will now try to come up with a ridiculous theory to back up his case!

[Vinyl Richie]

what a fool, that ain't no cheese roll.

Hold on, it's a roll....it has cheese. Damn he's got a point. Now I don't know what to think!

That's like saying batman isn't a super hero cos he doesn't have any super powers but wait, he's super and he's a hero.

Dynamic G - I think you've got a case

[blagdon]

Yo, I am the dynamic to the G and I still maintain that there is no difference between a cheese topped bap and a cheese roll as the ingredients are the same, it's just the way that they are arranged is different.

If you took a twix bar and moved the caramel from on top of the biscuit to being in the middle of the biscuit would it not still be a twix bar? I think so. Point proved. Case won.

Anyone up for some breakdancing at half time on Saturday?

[Vinyl Richie]

Originally posted by Boardy
This is frankly embarrassing for the Dynamic G, and I expect he will now try to come up with a ridiculous theory to back up his case!

it's cheese and it's a roll........... cheese roll!!! :dunce:

[Yorkie]

Originally posted by blagdon
Yo, I am the dynamic to the G and I still maintain that there is no difference between a cheese topped bap and a cheese roll as the ingredients are the same, it's just the way that they are arranged is different.

If you took a twix bar and moved the caramel from on top of the biscuit to being in the middle of the biscuit would it not still be a twix bar? I think so. Point proved. Case won.



The votes suggest otherwise.

A roll with some cheese sprinkled on top. ;)

[Meade's_Ball]

No it wouldn't be a Twix. They'd call it a Xwit or a Twix 2000.


*headspin*

[CHAPPERS]

Originally posted by blagdon
Yo, I am the dynamic to the G and I still maintain that there is no difference between a cheese topped bap and a cheese roll as the ingredients are the same, it's just the way that they are arranged is different.

If you took a twix bar and moved the caramel from on top of the biscuit to being in the middle of the biscuit would it not still be a twix bar? I think so. Point proved. Case won.

Anyone up for some breakdancing at half time on Saturday?

So why are Cheese topped baps sold as Cheese topped baps and not cheese rolls?

There must be an EU directive that clears this messy situation up.

Frankly i find you twix argument plain ridiculous, it completely changes the essence of the twix and makes it into a whole new bar, you've seen the adverts when the twix is snapped in two and all the biscuit kind of explodes, this simply would not happen if the caramel was in the midle instead.

[Lord Bracknell]

I don't believe it!

This thread has been going for a whole TWENTY MINUTES!

And no-one has mentioned the REALLY IMPORTANT issue.

What variety of cheese are we talking about, Bozza?

[blagdon]

Originally posted by Yorkie
The votes suggest otherwise.

A roll with some cheese sprinkled on top. ;)


So are you saying that cheese sprinkled inside the roll does not constitute a cheese roll then?

[Bozza]

Originally posted by Lord Bracknell
I don't believe it!

This thread has been going for a whole TWENTY MINUTES!

And no-one has mentioned the REALLY IMPORTANT issue.

What variety of cheese are we talking about, Bozza?

According to the Sainsbury packet - the cheese in question is 'Mature Cheddar'.

[Yorkie]

Originally posted by blagdon
So are you saying that cheese sprinkled inside the roll does not constitute a cheese roll then?

Yes because in a PROPER cheese roll the cheese is SLICED

:p

Preferably with tomato as well

[JJ McClure]

If the ingredients of said snack item are cheese and a roll then surely it's a cheese roll. It doesn't matter whether the cheese is inside, ontop, or underneath, it's still a cheese roll.

[Bozza]

Originally posted by Yorkie
Yes because in a PROPER cheese roll the cheese is SLICED

:p

Preferably with tomato as well

Surely a cheese and tomato roll?

[REDLAND]

Originally posted by Boardy
This is frankly embarrassing for the Dynamic G, and I expect he will now try to come up with a ridiculous theory to back up his case!

Dynamic G ??? now thats embarrassing !

[JJ McClure]

Originally posted by Yorkie
Preferably with tomato as well

No way, tomato makes the bread/roll go all soggy.

[bhaexpress]

Hell no, and with a stupid name like that definately Hell NO !

You know, this is what NSC is all about, dealing with the burning issues of the day. Sod football !

[cheeseroll]

Bollocks, this is a CHEESEROLL

[Simster]

Originally posted by Bozza
According to the Sainsbury packet - the cheese in question is 'Mature Cheddar'.

I think that comes as a relief to us all. The last thing we needed was for it to be cottage cheese as that would have thrown up a real can of worms.

[Yorkie]

Originally posted by Bozza
Surely a cheese and tomato roll?

That would be my first choice but if not available then a cheese roll with sliced cheese in the middle would come a close second.

Is it organic or vegetarian cheese?

[Hatterlovesbrighton]

This is a cheese flavoured roll, or possibly a cheesey roll.

I would wager that it's cheeseyness is not sufficient for it to be classfied as a "Cheese Roll"

[Vinyl Richie]

I voted not cheese roll but I want it changed. It's BLATENTLY a cheese roll.

Cheese (chedder flavour) + bread (roll variety) = cheese roll.....simple.

wait I've changed my mind...there's no butter/marg in said "cheese roll". It's a fake, it's just a relative of cheese on toast!!!! :ohmy:

[blagdon]

Originally posted by ChapmansThe Saviour
So why are Cheese topped baps sold as Cheese topped baps and not cheese rolls?

It's so the major food retail outlets can scam us out of more money by selling us the same bloody thing in two separate guises. I see that they have brainwashed you already!!

[Meade's_Ball]

I think the melting changes the status.
I think you could call it a cheesy roll. But not a cheese roll. Thats just dumb.

[Raphael Meade]

the man is a FOOOL!!!

a cheese roll must have cheese IN it, not on it.

i'm afraid what mr G has is a simple cheese topped roll.

[Simster]

Agreed. It's a cheesy roll, rather than a cheese roll.

[Virgo's Haircut]

I would say it's more of a plain roll with a hint of cheese :dunce:

[cheeseroll]

Ahem...

This IS a cheeseroll

[Virgo's Haircut]

Originally posted by cheeseroll
Ahem...

This IS a cheeseroll

So then cheesy, what type of cheese roll are you? If indeed you are a "proper" cheese roll!! :jester:

[Yorkie]

For it to be a cheese roll wouldn't it have to be at least 5% of cheese?

The ingredients have to be listed in order of quantity so the word cheese should not come first

Roll with a hint of cheese may be a better description. Has anyone reported this travesty to Trading Standards?

;)

[blagdon]

Originally posted by Meade's_Ball
I think the melting changes the status.
I think you could call it a cheesy roll. But not a cheese roll. Thats just dumb.

So would melted cheese inside of the roll constitute a cheese roll then? Of course it would. The consistency of the cheese bears no relation to whether it is a cheese roll or not.

[CHAPPERS]

Originally posted by blagdon
So would melted cheese inside of the roll constitute a cheese roll then? Of course it would. The consistency of the cheese bears no relation to whether it is a cheese roll or not.

Melting the cheese makes it part of the roll and therefore a cheesey roll, a cheese roll is clearly something you make, not something that already exists.

[Meade's_Ball]

Clearly, your piece of bread is riding on the gloried coat-tails of the cheese roll, trying to gain some of its prestige. The cheese roll has spent centuries bilding up its name. Don't let this over-sized crumb ruin it all now.

[Easy 10]

Look, this is clearly NOT a cheese roll.
If I sat down in a pub and ordered a cheese roll, and all they brought me over was empty roll with a cheesy flavoured top, then I'm sorry, but something untoward would happen. My protests would rise steadily in volume until my culinary concerns were addressed in full by the arrival of some cheese SLICES for said roll. In the event of no cheese arriving, I would either get my money back, or cause some form of damage to the establishment to recompense my grievance.

A <something> roll always, always refers to the filling, never the topping. What kind of world are we living in when rolls are described by their topping and not their filling ? Madness, complete madness.

[blagdon]

OK then, as you are still clearly not convinced I have just one last thing to say on this topic.

Imagine if you will that you have two items of food in front of you. One of them is a plain bread roll and the other is a slice of cheese. If you sliced the bread roll open and put the cheese inside before eating it I think we have all agreed that you will have just eaten a cheese roll. Correct?

If however you decided to place the slice of cheese on top of the roll before eating it are you saying that you have not just eaten a cheese roll?

Also, are you saying that by grating, melting or doing anything else to the cheese before putting it in the middle of or on top of the roll this changes the fact that you will have eaten a cheese roll?

I win. Thankyou.

[Meade's_Ball]

Non-Falmer-caring prannet.
Go and eat your yeast roll and never darken my dorm again.

[Dick Knights Mumm]

Cheese on Toast .......................... is exactly that. It isn't a sandwich.

Cheese on a Roll ........................ is also exactly that.

Cheese Rolls have cheese in them. And if there are other fillings they it will say so.

[Vinyl Richie]

Originally posted by blagdon
OK then, as you are still clearly not convinced I have just one last thing to say on this topic.

Imagine if you will that you have two items of food in front of you. One of them is a plain bread roll and the other is a slice of cheese. If you sliced the bread roll open and put the cheese inside before eating it I think we have all agreed that you will have just eaten a cheese roll. Correct?

If however you decided to place the slice of cheese on top of the roll before eating it are you saying that you have not just eaten a cheese roll?

Also, are you saying that by grating, melting or doing anything else to the cheese before putting it in the middle of or on top of the roll this changes the fact that you will have eaten a cheese roll?

I win. Thankyou.

yeah but if I put the bread and cheese in a blender and blended it good before eating/drinking the mush then that wouldn't be a cheese roll....that would be bread and cheese mush (obviously).

it's all in the way it's prepared

[blagdon]

Originally posted by Vinyl Richie
yeah but if I put the bread and cheese in a blender and blended it good before eating/drinking the mush then that wouldn't be a cheese roll....that would be bread and cheese mush (obviously).

it's all in the way it's prepared


I agree with you but I didn't mention anything about the bread being mashed up which would obviously mean that it is no longer in roll form.

My point relates purely to the cheese element of this concoction being applied into or onto a roll (which is still in it's original roll form).

Your analagy is quite frankly way off base.

[CHAPPERS]

You sound like the Sepp Blatter of the snack world to me.

[Lush]

It's cheese-bread in roll form.

Otherwise known as a cheese-bread roll.

How can you eat it plain though? Urrrgh. It just takes all the moisture out of your mouth.

[Easy 10]

Originally posted by Lush
How can you eat it plain though? Urrrgh. It just takes all the moisture out of your mouth.
.............................N ah, I'll leave it.

[Deano's Right Foot]

Well I just came back from lunch at Marks and Sparks (Holmbush). I ordered, received and comsumed a bowl of carrot and corainder soup, together with a roll peppered with pumpkin seeds. My partner however, ordered a Toasted Ham and Cheese Sandwich. She was given a little flag with the number 8 on it. Two minutes later the little flag was swapped for two thick slices of bread arranged as a sandwich, with cheese melted on the top slice. Upon further inspection we concluded that amazingly there was not one scrap of ham to be seen, on top, or indeed, inside the said sandwich! Clearly there has been an error, and once a complaint had been lodged this was soon rectified, and a new sandwich was delivered to our table. There were still two thick slices of bread arranged as a sandwich, with cheese melted on the top slice, but this time there was also a reasonable portion of ham secreted between the thick slices of bread. I had a bite and it was pretty good. Was this a Toasted Ham and Cheese Sandwich or was it a toasted ham sandwich with cheese melted on the top? And what happened to the ham initially I wonder?

You have just wasted approximately sixty seconds reading this, while I spent a good deal longer writing this.

[Easy 10]

Originally posted by Deano's Right Foot
You have just wasted approximately sixty seconds reading this, while I spent a good deal longer writing this.
In the immortal words of Hans Moleman: "You stole sixty seconds of my life, and I want them back........bahh, I'd only waste it anyway".

[Bozza]

Originally posted by Deano's Right Foot
Well I just came back from lunch at Marks and Sparks (Holmbush). I ordered, received and comsumed a bowl of carrot and corainder soup, together with a roll peppered with pumpkin seeds. My partner however, ordered a Toasted Ham and Cheese Sandwich. She was given a little flag with the number 8 on it. Two minutes later the little flag was swapped for two thick slices of bread arranged as a sandwich, with cheese melted on the top slice. Upon further inspection we concluded that amazingly there was not one scrap of ham to be seen, on top, or indeed, inside the said sandwich! Clearly there has been an error, and once a complaint had been lodged this was soon rectified, and a new sandwich was delivered to our table. There were still two thick slices of bread arranged as a sandwich, with cheese melted on the top slice, but this time there was also a reasonable portion of ham secreted between the thick slices of bread. I had a bite and it was pretty good. Was this a Toasted Ham and Cheese Sandwich or was it a toasted ham sandwich with cheese melted on the top? And what happened to the ham initially I wonder?

You have just wasted approximately sixty seconds reading this, while I spent a good deal longer writing this.

Bizarre and could be tricky to eat. Unless it's designed to be eaten with a knife and fork. And that's just not the point of a sandwich.

[CHAPPERS]

That's no sandwich.

[Withnail]

It's a bap and not a roll for one thing. For rolls go to Forfars, for baps see page 3 of The Sun.

[Kylies Stunt Arse]

I think the key here is the description given to the product by the retailer. "Cheese Topped Bap" Therefore, it is not a cheese bap, or roll, but a cheese TOPPED roll.

[Schrödinger's Toad]

Originally posted by Easy 10
In the immortal words of Hans Moleman: "You stole sixty seconds of my life, and I want them back........bahh, I'd only waste it anyway".


As always, the answers to all of life's really important questions can be found in the form of Simpsons quotes

[Vinyl Richie]

Originally posted by Deano's Right Foot
Well I just came back from lunch at Marks and Sparks (Holmbush). I ordered, received and comsumed a bowl of carrot and corainder soup, together with a roll peppered with pumpkin seeds. My partner however, ordered a Toasted Ham and Cheese Sandwich. She was given a little flag with the number 8 on it. Two minutes later the little flag was swapped for two thick slices of bread arranged as a sandwich, with cheese melted on the top slice. Upon further inspection we concluded that amazingly there was not one scrap of ham to be seen, on top, or indeed, inside the said sandwich! Clearly there has been an error, and once a complaint had been lodged this was soon rectified, and a new sandwich was delivered to our table. There were still two thick slices of bread arranged as a sandwich, with cheese melted on the top slice, but this time there was also a reasonable portion of ham secreted between the thick slices of bread. I had a bite and it was pretty good. Was this a Toasted Ham and Cheese Sandwich or was it a toasted ham sandwich with cheese melted on the top? And what happened to the ham initially I wonder?

You have just wasted approximately sixty seconds reading this, while I spent a good deal longer writing this.

That is quite clearly a CROQUE MONSIEUR ....... damn French again

[CHAPPERS]

This thread angers me.

[Barnet Seagull]

It'a a toughie alright. The traditionalist in me concurs with the majority, a cheese roll should contain cheese. The cheese should be a vital part of the roll, not merely an afterthought. Cheese deserves better.

I'll take a biscuit for example. Namely, the trusty hobnob.

It's a hobnob, simple, oaty, sugary, golden hobnob biscuit.

Cover it in chocolate and what do you get? A chocolate biscuit with an oaty filling? No. It's still a hobnob, just with chocolate coating.

Thus to be a cheese roll, the cheese needs to be the main constituent part of the roll. To be coated or topped is not sufficient. Cheese is central to the cheese roll and should not be considered anything but.

[GUNTER]

No, it's definetely a cheese topped bap. And the interesting thing about these tempting snacks is that the supermarkets charge 100% more than a normal bap by sprinkling with a miserly portion of grated cheese and melting it slightly.

[Bozza]

I can't believe he's brought this up again today.

He truly is a freak.

[GUNTER]

I must just say I have had a cheese topped bap from Asda - and very nice it was too with a spread of butter.

Also notice they are doing cheese topped baguettes in a twin pack for the more hungry amongst us.

[Bozza]

Oh god - not this one again.

[Curious Orange]

Sausage Rolls, a food you eat with your fingers, a sausage wrapped in pastry, ceases to be a sausage roll once you stop wrapping said sausage in said pastry (sausage on top of pastry is a flan, and whoever has heard of a pastry wrapped in sausage!!). The same rule applies to the humble cheese roll. Melt some cheese on top of a bap and the bap suddenly has more in common with cheese on toast than a cheese roll.

[C1 BHA]

Thought you MOD's had banned pointless threads:nono:

[Bozza]

Originally posted by C1 BHA
Thought you MOD's had banned pointless threads:nono:

We can ban pointless users...

[GUNTER]

Originally posted by Curious Orange
Sausage Rolls, a food you eat with your fingers, a sausage wrapped in pastry, ceases to be a sausage roll once you stop wrapping said sausage in said pastry (sausage on top of pastry is a flan, and whoever has heard of a pastry wrapped in sausage!!). The same rule applies to the humble cheese roll. Melt some cheese on top of a bap and the bap suddenly has more in common with cheese on toast than a cheese roll.

Therefore, the term cheese topped bap is correct! :clap2:

[C1 BHA]

Originally posted by Bozza
We can ban pointless users...

Bozza are you MOD's all power mad:p